Winter's sister

Chapter 11

I messed up. I had one mission and I failed. They won't be happy.

I just got back and this isn't an happy time. They just put a blindfold on my eyes and pushed me on the ground. I feel cold cement under my knees and palms. Ouf. Someone just kicked me in the stomach.

I won't do anything, I've learned my lesson. The last time I replicated it's been much worse and they waited even longer to give me water to heal myself completely. And when they felt that I was on the verge of the no coming back point, they would give me just enough to survive.

A knife just landed in my thigh while I was crawling back in pain. Someone immobilize me and pull back the knife and doubling my suffer. His weight is crushing me and I'm barely able to breathe. Out of a sudden he grab my wrist and my elbow to bend a part of my body that shouldn't bend.
Bleeding all over the place, my arm broken, silently crying all the tears of my body under my blindfold, the person get off of me.
An other person, an Hudra agent I presume, shout something but I can't ear it, now that I'm sobbing. Two men grab me and put me on my feet. I whined in pain feeling the new hole I have in my leg. Then my blindfold fall and I see the face of my torturer.

The Winter soldier.

I take a deep breathe as the memory is coming back. I've learned a long time ago that the Winter Soldier isn't Bucky. All this first one did was Hydra's corruptions, Bucky would never do something to me. I must have been in my head for a while because everybody's staring at me. Tony looks annoyed, Steve worried, while Wanda have tears in her eyes. Great. She've read my mind. She know.

I look at Steve in the eyes and ask him if we can go inside. I caught Bucky staring at me, probably again trying to trigger his memory. On our way inside, Nat and Wanda come across me, they want to talk to me alone.
Now in my room, I sit on a chair and they both get on the couch in front of me. After an awkward silence, Wanda started the conversation.

-You probably know what I've seen, and before we jump to the conclusion can you explain what happened please?

I never thought that telling things out loud could help me but I'm happily surprised. They listened to me, not judging and showed compassion. When I'm done, they look briefly at each other and get up at the same time to give me a hug.
Then the overflow arrives.
I'm not usually the crying type and in front of people even more but I couldn't help it. The last days have been really draining emotionally, ups and downs.
They both hug me tighter and it's now that I realize how my life would have been different if I hadn't gone to Hydra. I could have had girl friends and a life during a different century.
Now I'm a trained killer monster with powers. And some traumas.

Some time after we talked about other things, trying to change my mindset.

– I'm going to train, want to come? Asked Nat.

Both me and Wand said yes. I've nothing else to do.

This place is impressive.

At the same time with Steve

– You know Buck, your memories are gonna come back! They always do, even when you don't want them to. It may just take time.

– Mhmm and what if they won't? She always have this hopefull expression every time she caught me looking her way.

– She told me you always remembered her every now and then at Hydra and they had to make you forget every time. And you always get memories when you see something familiar, I'm sure it'll come back eventually.

– We will see I guess.. She had to watch me get brainwashed every time, I can't imagine how painful it was for her. She just had me back and I were gone.

– Yes must have been, and when you escaped, it was surely even worse, considering their deal.

– What deal? He asked surprisingly.