W.A.R.M.T.H: The Prologue

Daddy Issues

Amora

    The silence in the trees is all that ever makes me feel comforted. It's strange to me that silence is considered negative when really. It's beautiful. It is beautiful to me at least. Silence is the only thing that can really be pure.

    I'm still feeling AJ's feelings, which also means I can't stop thinking about him. I'm trying so hard to find any distraction in the silence. Of course there's the leaves being blown by the wind, an animal scurrying about here and there. But I'm listening for voices, so I know if I need to leave. I don't want humans polluting my perfect silence. I'm not sure when I stopped crying, but my tears are dry. I'm feeling his pleasure right now and I am entirely disgusted. And angry. Does that boy have even the slightest comprehension of emotion? His best friend is in love with him, he swears up and down he's not afraid of who he is but now he's doing the dirty with someone? I bet it's Raven. I bet she's enjoying it.

    Does she know about Ren? She probably does, she probably had it figured out as soon as she saw them together. I love Raven, but she can be so insensitive. So selfish. I bury my face in my hands and bring my legs up onto the branch I'm on to sit crisscross applesauce. I'd rather be dead than dealing with any of this. My procedures, my horrible connection with an emotionally manipulative bad boy. A best friend that despite everything, I'm always jealous of. And a psycho hung up on the bad boy that's currently having sex with the best friend I'm jealous of. Not to mention Derrick, who seems like a total tool. Too perfect for him to be real, he might as well be his mother's Ken doll. And I don't even like perfect guys. So even if he was real he wouldn't be my type, much less the kind of guy that I want to marry. I wish I could just end it all, end all of the noise, the responsibility, the emotional turmoil. It sucks. Plain and simple. There's nothing worse than being forced to live. I'd rather be forced to kill as long as I got to go along right after. But I can't die, I especially can't kill myself. I promised my dad I would never do any such thing.

"Now, Amora; your life is a gift from god himself. But trust me, sweetheart, it won't always feel like it. When you're older; you'll see it as more of a curse. What you are..." his kneeling form shows a faraway look in his eye before returning his gaze to mine. "It's not natural, and you'll hate it someday. You'll probably hate your mother and I for making you this way. Everything will be negative. Nothing will feel pure. Believe me princess; I've experienced the same feeling, for similar reason." My father gives me a sad smile "I know this is a lot for a sweet 5 year old girl like you to handle. But I want you to promise me something; okay princess?" I give him my brightest smile "Anything, daddy." He puts his hands on my shoulders. "No matter how hard it gets, no matter how much you hate us. I want you to promise me, not to take your god given life away from this earth. Okay princess?" I nod at him, "Of course daddy. I'd do anything for you." He chuckles, "I know you would princess." He wraps me in a hug "I love you, my baby girl." I grasp on to him tight "I love you too daddy."

I snap out of my reverie when a tear splashes down onto my hand. I stare at it as more roll down to meet it "Daddy." I whisper to myself as tears pour down my cheeks. My bawling keeps me from paying attention to the sound of approaching feet. That's why I don't notice when he calls out to me.

"Amora?"

It takes him climbing up the tree and grasping my hand before I realize he's there.

"Amora?"

    AJ asks quietly. I try to control my tears to no avail. He grips it tighter, but he doesn't say anything else. He only sits there, holding my hand and waiting for my tears to slow. My head falls onto his shoulder and he kisses the top of it. He whispers, "I'm sorry." into my hair. Not expecting a response, just wanting to make sure I know. Not that I'm sure what he's apologizing for. Maybe he's just apologizing for simply being himself. I think about the mural he painted on the wall of the school last night. It was beautiful, an expression of emotion in a way that can only be described as divine. I could feel his emotion just by looking at the painting. And of course, that was well before he handed me my diamond bracelet that I threw in the garbage disposal, so it wasn't some freaky bond like the one we've been experiencing since. It was real. It was because of his natural artistry that conveyed the emotion so well. It was a breathtaking piece of art. My tears have all but stopped now and I gather up the courage to speak.