Arabella

~ 10 ~

"Good morning dad." I say as I enter the kitchen. He's making himself a cup of coffee. He looks up at me and he smirks. It's one of those where he knows I did something, the only problem is I haven't done anything. "What?" I ask.

"Oh nothing." He says as he sips his coffee. "What time did you get home last night?" He says. I grab an apple and a juice from the fridge for a small breakfast.

"I don't know. Late." I shrug. I didn't get home until one in the morning. I'm exhausted. But I couldn't leave. I just wanted, no want to spend more time with Xander. Everything feels right when I'm with him.

Dad hums. And I hate that I have to tell him I won't be home today.

"Actually. The project isn't finished so I told him I would go right after school. Is that okay?" I ask. He sets his coffee down and stares at me. He doesn't move or blink so I get flustered and I blush. He immediately smirks again making me confused.

"Go ahead. I'll call George to go out tonight or something." He says. George is his old work friend. I nod at him.

"Okay, I love you. Have a good day!" I yell as I make my way to the garage to get my car.

I can't help but smile on my way to school. Last night we did not do anything like my dream but I had such a good time. We just talked. He told me so many stories about his family and his friends. It's so easy to talk to him we didn't even realize how late it was.

As soon as I got home I passed out in bed and had another dream about him. It was almost the same but we were at that spot in the woods he took me to. To say I'm flustered is an understatement. I'm feeling very needy and I feel bad about it.

Brody is no longer my boyfriend so I know I'm allowed to have these feelings. I've never had them before so I think I feel guilty because of Xander. Xander is my friend, he's very quickly becoming my best friend. He probably doesn't feel the way that I feel at all.

When I pull into the parking lot I park my car and just sit. I can't help but wonder if Xander ever thinks of me outside of being friends. If he doesn't that's okay I don't want to lose his friendship. It would be nice though if he did. I don't even fully know what I feel.

The only thing I know is I want to touch every part of his body and I want him to do that to me too.

I turn and I see Brody's truck pull in next to me. We are twenty minutes early today so we are two of the few people who show up early. I sigh and lean back. I know I need to talk to him.

I get out of the car the same time he comes around to me. He smiles at me but he doesn't try to hug me like he used to.

"Hey." He says.

"Good morning. I didn't think you would be here so early." He hates mornings. He rubs the back of his neck and nods.

"I was hoping to catch you. I just really think we need to talk. I was rushed the last time." He says. I agree with him. Looking at him right now I don't feel angry. I'm sad but I think that is now more because he lied to me for so long. He made me think we had a future together when we never would.

"Okay." I say hesitantly.

"I want you to know I have no hard feelings if you say no to the whole pretend dating thing. But if you do say no I don't want to lose you. I want you in my life, just as my best friend."

"I want that too." I say honestly. Stepping closer so we don't have to talk as loud I continue. I'm just upset you lied to me for so long. I never would have judged you for being gay." He looks down and then back up.

"I know. I just was so scared my parents would find out. They are going to hate me." He says holding back tears. My heart hurts for him. No parent should hate their child.