Cherry Bomb [h.s]

10

The sun is just starting to set as I lean against the stage door. I managed to convince Atticus to give me a few minutes before the show starts, but I have no idea how I'm going to keep this up all summer when the sun sets around show time.

I take a long drag of my cigarette, trying to smoke as much and as fast as I can before I'm inevitably dragged onstage. It sucks that I can't really spend a lot of time like this, but I also know that this is an opportunity that I can't just back out of now.

I can hear the cheering coming from inside, the sound dampened by the stage door. 20,000 people.

I feel a push against the door, but I keep leaning against it anyway to deter whoever it is. I still have a few minutes left.

But the door opens up a bit anyway, and I look over to see Angel's head popping through the doorway.

"Ah, I was wondering why the door was a little harder to open than usual," he says, "C'mon, it's showtime."

I sigh and put out my cigarette, then smooth down my clothes and walk back into the backstage area. 

It's even louder than I thought it would be, about 10 times as loud as the biggest show I had ever played before this. Already I could feel my heart pounding, the blood pumping through my veins. Every nerve in my body was tingling, but it was good. The feeling just reminded me that this was all real. 

I walk over to where Amber and Willow are nervously waiting to walk onstage. When they see me, they each smile anxiously. I take both of their hands in mine, giving them a good squeeze of reassurance. 

We decided to go with a classic red and black theme for our outfits for tonight. Willow went for a simple red top and black leather pants, Amber wearing a half red-half black dress, and I of course went for my usual lace up front red crop top, fishnets, and black shorts.

We can see just a glimpse of the arena, just a glimpse of what we're in for. Tons of screaming fans were intimidating, even though they weren't really there for us. 

"Are you ready for this?" Amber asks me. 

"Not in the slightest," I reply, then drag all of us onto the stage. 

My heart is pounding so loudly in my ears, it almost drowns out the screams of the arena. There's a buzzing in my fingertips, and the weight of anticipation causes my breaths to become heavier. 

The lights are blinding, but they sort of distract from all the faces in the crowd. LEDs surround the bottom of the stage, illuminating us in a wash of red and pink. To my surprise, though, there don't seem to be any sort of fast moving or strobing lights that are typically seen at a rock concert. 

It seems to take forever to walk to our places onstage, the clunking of my boots becoming louder as I become more nervous. As soon as we're visible, the cheering becomes deafening, and we can no longer ignore the fact that 20,000 people are going to see us perform.

I pick up my guitar, Amber picks up her bass, and Willow takes a seat at her drums. 

I just take a deep breath in, then nod to Amber and Willow. 

I'm not really scared or unconfident at all, but there's still an uncertainty in the air. 

We start playing our signature opening song, those familiar beats and melodies like second nature. And before I know it, it's like I'm back in Willow's garage again, practicing for the first time. 

When it comes time for me to sing, I'm no longer nervous. In fact, I feel exhilarated and free. I now know what Louis was talking about earlier; it's like I was destined to do this, like this was my true home.