Delicate Pulse | Violentine

Fever

(TW: mention of bl**d and v*m*t)

White chips of frost were wandering in, flicking onto our clothes, licking every surface it fell on.

"You have to close it now," I say. "Our windows aren't even supposed to be open."

"But it's so pretty," she swoons. "Just like you."

Snow caresses the palm of her hand, her warmth converting them to droplets. She tilts her arm, cold water trickles down it.

I shake my head once. "Come on, close it."

She sighs but listens. She tugs the windows shut, latching them. "I wish they would let us out in the snow more often. Imagine dancing, singing and..."

Her freckles ripen pink. "I would love to kiss you under snow."

My heart plummets, dragging my shoulders down with it. I had to tell her.
"Minnie?"

Her blue crystal gaze glances down at me and she glows. "Yes?"

I breathe in. "I really care about you."

"Me too," she laughs. She uncrosses her legs and hops down from perching on the desk. She meets me between our bunks, tucking my hair behind my ear. I shiver, stepping away. Her expression falls.

God, this is going to fucking hurt.

"I really care about you," I repeat. "But I think that maybe we should be friends."

She suppresses a giggle. "We are silly! You're my one and only."

"N-No I mean," I stammer. Shit. "I mean, like just friends."

The color drains from her face. "What?"

"I just feel that we would work better as friends rather than lovers. I think I prefer the way things were before between us."

She blinks, aimlessly. "Are you trying to break up with me?"

"Well, yeah... but like, we could still be friends like before-"

She cuts me off. "Violet, why do couples break up?"

"Huh?"

"They break up either because they are having problems or they're not in love anymore. Are we having any problems?"

We weren't, not really. "Uh, no..."

Her lips quiver. "Do you...Do you not love me anymore?"

"No...No! Of course, I do," I fret. I loved her with every fibre in my body. She saved me. She changed me. She made me better.

"Then why break up?"

The silence that followed that question almost ate me alive. She sighs, resting her hands on my shoulders. "Okay, I know that I've been a little pushy lately and maybe I'm moving things along too fast. That's not fair on you and I'm really sorry if I've hurt you, it's never my intention it's just... "

She pauses, her breath shaking narrowly. "Vi, I'm so in love with you. I'm crazy about you and things are good. Are you really going to throw that all away because you think we'd be better as friends?"

I wanted to say something more. I wanted to explain but her expression was killing me. She was squinting so vastly to hold back welling tears. Her crystal eyes could just shatter.