Delicate Pulse | Violentine

Ameliorate

It sits there half empty and alone, barely touched. Disturbed at the slightest movement. Just a sad glass of water. Unwanted and forgotten.

"Don't worry, take your time. Deep breaths."

I'm startled. A row of nails taps against her clipboard. Her smile tugged by two invisible strings from both cheeks. I don't like looking at her. She can't stop looking at me. She speaks again, softly. "Did you not sleep well again?"

My mind feels thicker than the water in that cup. Just a sludge black pool of nothing.

"It's okay to feel anger, Violet."

I shake my head. "What?"

"Feeling angry is okay, we all get angry sometimes. It's normal."

"Yeah...so?"

The lady's bony shoulders scrape against the backrest of her seat. "Did your grandmother ever make you angry?"

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

"Are you thirsty?"

Minnie's eyebrows furrow as she stands over me. Her arms drape around my neck like a loose scarf. Warmth. A peck lands on my head. She slips into the space beside me. Humming.

I guide my attention away from the glass of water. I hesitate, still trying to regather my focus. "I'm...hungry?"

She smoothly passes an apple. I take a large crunch out of it.

Then I notice we're sitting all alone together.

"Where's everyone?"

She scans around, still humming. "Not sure where Louis is annnd you know where Brody is."

Spontaneously, I look over to the other side of the room and spot Brody immediately sitting right next to Clementine. Brody spends every day trailing after her like a puppy. They sit together for every dinner now. They exchange inside jokes with whispers. They even go on little walks in the afternoon and bring back little daises that they find on their journey. I've seen Louis with them sometimes, the three of them cackling with laughter.

Not that long ago there was hollering in the hallways. It zoomed past classrooms and zipped around corners. It was Louis clinging onto Clementine like a backpack. A giraffe twisted around a tigers arch.

"She's so fucking ripped," he babbled to me afterwards. It felt like a hornet buzzing in my ear. "She could probably knock someone out in one punch."

I wanted to yank his coat over his head.

I think at this point Minnie has caught where my eyes have landed. She takes a spoon full of her own meal and gulps.

"So...have you and Clementine been talking?"

First Louis, now Minnie? What the fuck is going on?

I shake my head slowly, hair falls over my eyes. "I haven't spoken to her since the fight."

She leans closer to me, sighing. "I know you guys don't get along. It's hard enough sharing a room with one unfavourable person. Two must be really...difficult."

My neck feels itchy. "Minnie-"

"I think you guys should make up."

The itch quickly fades into a sea of goosebumps. I turn and look at her directly and she stares back at me in surprise, almost as if she was a little taken aback with what she had said. Just like I was.