Trouble in Paradise.

5. Tears.

Chapter 5: Tears.

"Thank you for coming, Valarie." Mrs. Lopez says, hugging me.

"I wouldn't miss this for the world." I tell her before I pull away.

"The pastor will arrive in an hour. You can help us set up." She tells me and I nod.

Walking into the church, I see the floral arrangement on the altar. It spells out "Baron."

I'm trying my hardest not to cry.

It's going to be a very hard and long day.

I walk over to a table where I see cards with Baron's face on it.

"What are these?" I ask the girl seated beside the table.

"There are cards with Baron's achievements on it. He wanted this to be at his funeral. We're gonna hand them to the guests with a dandelion. That's his favorite flower and he wanted everyone to have one in memory of him." She tells me and tears pool in my eyes, threatening to spill.

Blinking the tears away, I smile at her before speaking.

"Can I help you set them up?" I ask her and she nods. Drawing out a seat beside her for me to sit on.

"Thank you." I say, before I sit on the chair.

It's finally time for the funeral and I'm trying my best not to cry. I don't know how I'm going to react when I see the pallbearers carrying Baron into the church in a box. I'm sitting beside Mrs. Lopez, so I'm trying my best to keep my cool and not cry. But I don't think I can hold my tears in any longer.

The pastor starts talking and I tune him out. At the corner of my eye, I see Zachary sit down on a chair two rows down. I stare at him and he stares back at me, a frown on his face. I stop staring and I focus my attention on the pastor.

Thirty minutes pass and it's time for me to give my eulogy. I don't think I can do this. Baron's coffin came in shortly before the pastor called me upstage. I hope I can keep the tears in and deliver my speech without any slip ups.

"Good Morning." I say into the microphone.

Everyone is staring at me and I mean everyone. I can feel their eyes piercing through me. It's like I'm made of glass and they can see every organ in me. They see my pumping heart as it beats fast. They can see the sweat at the back of my neck, hidden by my long brown hair. It's almost like I'm see-through and I know they are judging me. I'm a young girl who was friends with a sixty four year old married man, if that doesn't scream sugar baby then I don't know what does. That's what they are probably thinking.

But why though, why couldn't we just have been friends?

Focus, Valarie.

The sooner you get some words out, the faster you leave this stage.

"For Baron." I start, staring at the paper in my hand.
"Baron was a friend. Through and through. He was the only good thing in my life in the past year. And I know our friendship was weird to many, hell I read the articles people wrote about it. But I didn't care. It didn't matter what people thought because I knew that for the first time in a long time, I had someone who had my back." I say, pausing to get some air in my lungs.

I'm on the verge of hyperventilating.

"Baron was happy. I know the circumstances of his death proves otherwise, but I can assure you, he really was. He was funny, he told dirty jokes...a lot of them. He was in love. With his wife of twenty five years, Esther. He'd say "Valarie, every time I see her it's like I'm meeting her for the first time and the world just stops, I see only her." I say sniffling as tears run down my cheeks. Mrs. Lopez wipes her eyes with a tissue.