I never asked for this

chapter 41

*Nadia's pov*

I felt my heart drop to my stomach as i looked in Natasha's eyes.

"i- i-" i tried to speak however my words wouldn't form in my throat as her gaze pierced into me,i swallowed and took a deep breathe trying to compose myself.

The look on her face didn't change it stayed merely resigned whilst my mind tried to think about what i could say,my mouth hung agape as i attempted to build up the courage "this isn't fair!" i argued not being able to say those little words which would allow my freedom.

Natasha smiled at my words "stop smiling! this isn't funny its not fair!" i reamed at her with tears welling in my eyes.

"Nadia you know what our agreement is,either you say it or you don't theres no other option" she simply told me as she looked into my teary eyes "fine! give me a second!" i quickly said.

I sucked in a breath and tried to speak the words,still though nothing came out of my mouth.

The words were getting stuck in my throat before i could even say them,i should fucking hate both of them! they put me through so much and kidnapped me! why couldn't i say it!?

At this point i broke into sobs "i can't" i weakly admitted burying my face into my hands allowing the tears to keep coming.

"i don't hate you,i don't hate you,i don't hate you" i kept mumbling to myself over and over accepting the harsh reality;i had grown fond of the two women even if i didn't want to admit it previously.

A hand was placed onto my shoulder pulling me in "its okay Nadia" Natasha said making shushing noises while she let me continue to cry.

I began to feel bad about the words i had said to Wanda which made everything worse.

"Im so so so sorry Mommy" i said through sobs.

She pulled me closer so i was hugging her side now as she kept on shushing me "Nadia don't apologise to me,apologise to Mama okay?" she said making me nod.

After 15 minutes i was beginning to compose myself.

Sniffling i took a shaky breathe debating whether to ask the question on my mind as i calmed down,every few minutes or so i would hiccup as my tears began to dry across my cheeks that had a red tint to them.

"uhm..w-why did mama get so mad.." i quietly asked stuttering in the middle accidentally.

Natasha bit her lip thinking of an answer "Nadia baby,well you see mama doesn't exactly have a family" she said making me look up at her confused "her parents and her brother are deceased" she completed the sentence.

A wave of guilt washed over me.

I had just said all that crap about her family,oh god- she probably thinks im some kind of an inhumane monster now...

"i didn't mean to say all that about her!" i vastly tried explaining to Natasha who was most likely thinking the same thing about me,yes they'd kidnapped me but not once had they said anything bad about my family life like i had just done!

She gave me a pitiful look "oh Nadia..." she said tucking my hair behind my ear "i know you didn't mean any of it Babygirl" she reassured me as she saw the panic on my face.

I gave her a grateful smile "do you think mama will forgive me?" i asked with hopeful eyes.

"Nadia she's not going to stay mad at you,she knows you wouldn't say it under normal circumstances" Nat informed me trying to alleviate my worries.

Giving a half nod i hugged her which she didn't expect however she hugged straight back.

"are you sure?" i questioned still feeling bad.

Natasha laughed slightly at my repeated question "yes im 100% sure,no need to worry that little head of yours"

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*third person pov*

The two enjoyed their bonding moment for several more moments.

Now they were making their way up the stairs with Nadia holding Natasha's hand,not that Natasha made her but the girl wanted the slight comfort it gave.

Nadia made Nat walk into the room first with her hiding behind her,Wanda was sat on the edge of bed with the sound of the door breaking her out of her deep thoughts;she looked up seeing the love of her life with the slight outline of the girl behind me.

After Nat gave her a calming hand squeeze Nadia stepped foward "Nadia has something she wants to say to you" Natasha said as they agreed on the stairs that she would speak first.

The brunette took a deep breath "im so sorry mama" she said looking at the ground.

You could tell from the look on her face that she generally meant it which Wanda could tell, "oh honey,its okay" she said opening her arms making the girl shuffle into them hugging her.

"im sorry,i didn't know i swear" Nadia mumbled whilst gripping tightly onto the woman "Nadia look at my face" Wanda calmly said making the girl do so "see im not mad?" Wanda told the girl who saw no anger or resentment on her face at all.

They kept on hugging as Nadia didn't want to let go "what i said wasn't okay though" Nadia replied,Wanda cupped the girls face "thats what we want you to do angel okay hmm? just without all the yelling" the woman said adding the last part on the end with a chuckle.

Furrowing her eyebrows Nadia looked confused towards Wanda then Natasha who nodded and joined the two on the bed "we want you to talk about your feelings with us" Nat explained.

"we realise that this is never going to work if we don't let you communicate" Wanda continued on with Nat's point "we want you to come talk to us whenever you have any of these thoughts,we can sit down and discuss them together..as adults" she finished.

Nadia looked skeptical at them "but won't you get mad?" she tried saying before she was shushed by Nat "don't worry about us getting mad Nadia,when you say you want to speak we aren't your mommy or mama temporarily,we're your friends" Natasha said.

"Don't ever try keeping any thoughts inside your head because you'll think it'll hurt us,a couple words can't hurt our egos;right Nat?" Wanda joked rubbing the girls back.

The girl nodded examining the womens words in her head "thank you..." she whispered.

They all group-hugged together for a couple of minutes before Nadia pulled away "does this mean im still getting 'my ass spanked until its red'" she said with quotation marks.

Natasha laughed whilst Wanda looked at her befuddled "okay maybe i over-exaggerated a tad" Nat said rubbing the back of her neck as the girl sighed in relief "don't think you're off the hook though" she said pointing at the girl.

However Nadia didn't even care as long as it wasn't a spanking she didn't really mind.

"First things first,that god awful makeup has to go" Wanda said as her and Nat laughed whilst Nadia looked offended until she looked in a mirror seeing it all smudged from when she had been crying "good point" she agreed herself blushing in embarrassment.

After Natasha had wiped the makeup off for her she yawned resting her head on Wanda's chest as she sat on her lap.

"tired" she mumbled feeling too exhausted to say anything else.

Nat closed the bedroom curtains creating darkness for her as Wanda began stroking her hair and shushing her "its okay go to sleep,we'll still be here afterwards" she said with Nadia trying to fight sleep on her lap.

Eventually with a lot of reassuring words Nadia allowed herself to sleep.

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Authors note

Song suggestion: Norman Fucking Rockwell by Lana Del Rey

I think we all know that one guy who thinks he's so amazing and brilliant simply because he's understood, the guy who has a nice guy complex because no girls wanna date him, but it's actually because he's a douchebag.