trash star - punznap

☾

. °. • 。

"yoo, what's up? everything good?"

they're greeted by a guy in a white beanie - easily recognizable as one of luke's goons and best homies - as soon as they come through the front door. he's holding a beer bottle in his left hand, using his right for handshakes and back pats.

"i'm dylan, but people like to call me boomer, but if you do that i'll beat you up," he slurs.

"okay boomer," sam chuckles, brushing him off.

"bro! i said-"

they push past him, diving headfirst into the suffocating heat inside the hallway. the lights are dim out here, while other rooms are pitch black. expensive paintings line the walls, and you could wonder how the hell someone would dare to host a rowdy high school party in this house.

it feels like a movie when nick comes through with his boys; they march forward in a group, and he's in the lead, just a little dizzy and just a little lighter on his feet. in a few moments he can take over the world.

people stare at him as he walks by, head held high like he's never been more confident. and tonight that's true, tonight nothing will get him down. he will rule the whole fucking place, and luke will stand on the sidelines, watching powerlessly as his fate catches up with him.

the kitchen is way more crowded, with people sitting on island counters and pouring drinks left and right. harvey runs right up to someone he knows, and in the blink of an eye their little group has been scattered. he's on his own to fend for himself, and that's okay.

he passes couples, jocks, a few college students, girls he barely remembers the names of. his nose stings with the sweet smell of weed, but for the first time ever he keeps away. his legs follow the music, taking him out into the grand living room, where couches and tables have been pushed aside to form a makeshift dance floor.

it gets even warmer once he's made his way inside the big crowd, but he doesn't let that bother him. he can feel the bass rock his whole body, lift him away to higher lands. rainbow lights flash in his face, paint the room for brief moments at a time.

he can see the pool in the backyard through the huge windows. it's filled with people, and for a second he's tempted to sneak out there and hop in with his clothes on, just to get to feel the cold water surrounding him, grazing his hot skin.

but before he can act he hears someone call out for him, once at first, then twice when he doesn't spot the source.

"nick!"

it's barely audible over the loud music. but there - underneath a speaker - stands sadie, waving and jumping up and down like crazy in an attempt to catch his attention.

his lips form a smile as he skips right over to her, engulfing her in a bear hug before she can say anything else. she hugs him just as tightly back.

her hair is as smooth as last time, and it smells even sweeter. his greedy fingers can't keep away. they comb through it over and over, even though there's not a single knot or tangle in sight. it feels like he's touching clouds, or a beautiful ragdoll cat.

"i take it you like my hair?" sadie giggles, patiently waiting for him to finish.

he does. he's mesmerized.

"how do you make it so soft?" he wonders.

"good conditioner, some hair treatments.. but it's pretty much like this naturally."

it shines in the colorful light, her face shines, she shines.

she takes a drink from her red cup before grabbing his hand, pulling him along with her. they squeeze through gaps in the herd of wasted teenagers, just to get to the very center.

nick feels trapped; trapped in between sweaty bodies, unable to breathe the humid air that way too many people share. the room spins, his whole world spins, and the nausea begins to creep up on him.

but just when he thinks he's done for, sadie cups his cheeks and keeps him steady.

"are you alright?" she shouts.

for a few seconds he just stares at her. his blank, dilated eyes flicker. sadie pets him carefully with her thumb, and it feels like an angel's touch.

he takes a deep breath, lets his racing heart calm down. then he smiles at her, a big, goofy smile, and she breaks out into laughter.

she takes him dancing, takes his hands and spins him a few laps to the beat of the music. she's so gentle yet full of energy at the same time, and nick feels it all flood into his mind.

suddenly being in the middle of the room, at the center of attention, doesn't seem so frightening anymore. with sadie by his side he's the star of the show, he's the ruler, he's the one sitting on a pedestal looking down at all the wasted rich kids below.

luke should see him now. then he would realize that he isn't a little pussy, and that he's never been one either. he can stand up for himself, he knows what he wants and what he's worth.

he gets lost in that spurt of confidence for a while, dancing with his eyes closed like nothing else matters. the ground below him seems uneven, but he manages to stay on his feet anyway.

everything is fine, hazy but perfect, until a pair of arms wrap around his middle, and a body presses close to his. he doesn't care to look at first. hot breaths bounce against his lips, mix with his own, and in that moment he thinks of ocean blue eyes, of light stubble, of fluffy blond hair between his fingers...

but instead there's forest greens when he opens his eyes, and thick, jet black hair. she's so gorgeous.

she stays close, wets her lips, smiles so smugly at him. he smiles back. he smiles back and gives her a light shove, just to tease. every time she gets close he repeats it. he plays his little game until she gives up.

in the back of his mind he wonders where clay is, where the others are, but at the same time he couldn't care less, because everything is wonderful and he doesn't want to leave. he feels free in his bubble of joy.

the night is still young and he's still young too, too young to let moments like these go to waste. he cherishes the feelings, his beating heart, the heat, the flashing lights.

he's free. and it'll all be okay.

°.    •.   。