"Lie low at Lupin's."
In a proper home for the first time since he was 21, Sirius Black writes letters to all his friends the night of Voldemort's return. Remus goes out and places the letter on each tombstone and a small, empty cottage where Remus...
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My Marl,
There's not a day that goes by where I don't regret not giving you that ring. I was gonna ask you to marry me, made all the arrangements with Jamsie and Lils too but you went off on that mission and then you didn't come back. I wish it was me instead, it's so hard to be anywhere without you, except maybe Azkaban, you don't fucking deserve that place, you're just too perfect for it. Our wedding Marls, it was going to be the best, most awesome day of our life baby, just like you wanted but you had to go. I often think of what I could've done different that day, maybe held onto your hand for a while longer or kissed you or maybe just gotten down on my knees and given you the damn ring. The same one you'd fawned over when we went shopping for Lily. I'll never understand why you liked that one, it was so simple and yet there was a grace to it. That's probably why you liked it so much, you've always been quite eccentric.
You were the one who made me rethink my capabilities of loving Marl. I didn't think I was good enough to be loved or even love someone and you set that record straight that night in the Astronomy tower. I still remember looking at you in a whole new light under the stars. It was just us. Just Black and McKinnon and I don't think I've ever been more sure of anything than I was in that moment. I fell in love that day. Till then, you were just my best friend who drove me up the wall and I did absolutely nothing to stop it. Maybe I enjoyed it or maybe I just couldn't fathom how someone could be so annoying yet bloody adorable.
You remember how McGonagall would have to keep screaming in my ear so I'd pay attention and actually comment during Quidditch games? It was because I was too busy looking at you, your hair whipping into your face because of the wind, your smile when you got the Quaffle in. I was so jealous of James when the games ended because he'd get to hug you and I would hang back trying not to let that affect me. I know he was hopelessly in love with Lily but still.
I don't think either of realized how fucking important we were to each other. Not until I had no other option but to look at pictures of you, I took one of you into Azkaban, it let me remember that I wasn't a hopeless case incapable of love, just a little misunderstood with the concept of it, like you'd told me up on the tower. You know better than anyone, I'm a right prat when it comes to feelings, although I'm getting a bit better with it because of Harry. So I suppose what I'd like to say is that you Marlene Lisa McKinnon are the most important person in my life and I love you so much. It's weird isn't it, I'm the one named after a star and yet you've always been my shining light. Guiding me away from reckless shit, that's possibly why I ended up in so much crap when you were gone. Because I had no one to keep me sane.
I promised to always save you from the thunderstorms and you promised to keep me at least 10 meters away from the abomination that is shortbread, maybe we'll get to do that next time? When I come up over there one day I'll finally see you again and this time I won't let you go. It'll be you and me forever. Like it was always meant to be. Keep shining my light, I promise to see you, not too soon though or Moony will go beserk.
I love you McKinnon.
Yours always,
Sirius.
A/N: Blackinnon is bae! Honestly, I love how the entire Marauder fandom is split in 2 about Remus and Sirius ships even though we have next to no information about them. I have always been a Remadora shipper and I discovered Blackinnon when I started reading fanfics. I wasn't ever a Wolfstar shipper but I've been warming up to it a bit recently and I have a theory that connects all 3 of these ships. Anyway, I always thought that Sirius would be commitment phobic because he's terrified of relationships, having witnessed his parents' very toxic one and he eventually begins overcoming it when he spends time with the Potters and Marlene. Next up is Dorcas Meadows!
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Thanks for reading, stay safe. lots of love, writinganewtale ✨
