Nᴏ Hᴏᴍᴏ﹖ [₂Cʜᴀɴ]

♪ ꜰɪᴠᴇ ♪

『••✎••』

Why is Jackson always throwing a party in fics? 😭

I'm about to hop on the trend- 

"Am I desperate? Like would you label me as desperate?" Chan held his phone out to Minho, showing his text thread to him.

"Do you want an honest answer or a sugar coated one?"

Minho scrolled through the one sided texts, seeing that Changbin hadn't texted nor read the messages Chan had sent for the past three days. "Both, maybe?" Minho tossed the phone off to the side. "Of course not...You're fucking pathetic."

Chan whimpered, throwing himself back onto his bed. "I know!" He buried himself under his blankets, tempted to take one of the pillows and suffocate himself with it. "What should I do?!" 

Minho pulled the blankets off his face "maybe not spam his phone?" He pulled him up so he couldn't hide anymore.

"So it looks like that twat- waffle is deciding to be a bitch about this..." He wrapped his arms around the older "you need to just ignore him for now. You can't keep chasing after Changbin, especially when he's such a fucking asshole."

Minho rubbed up and down his arm "don't do this to yourself, Channie. This isn't going to end well and you know that." Chan took comfort in his arms, Minho wasn't one for being this close so he'd make the most of it.

"I can't help it. After years of forcing myself to keep my feelings in check, I finally got the type of reaction I was hoping for." 

Minho scoffed, pinching his arm in response "This was what you wanted? A fake- straight boy playing with your feelings, using you, and then ghosting you the next day? Seriously?"

"Well when you say it like that..." Chan curled further into his arms, he was right he just wished he wasn't. 

"Look Chan." Minho gripped his cheeks, pinching and rubbing them. "I can't force you to do anything. But as your best friend I think it would be wise to just drop this."

Chan really didn't think he could but he'd try. All of this was for his best interest; he just didn't think this would be so hard. "Just make sure you come with me to that party tomorrow."

Illıllııllıllı

Okay.

So having Minho come with him to the party accomplished nothing for him. Chan forgot that Minho would get absolutely wasted whenever alcohol was present.

Not a good choice.

Especially when he had a few drinks himself.

"Hey! I didn't think you'd come." 

Chan turned towards the new voice, taking in Hyunjin's appearance next to him. He was always so well presented - good looking too. "Don't I always come to your parties? Got the best supply compared to some others." They had to practically scream over the music to hear each other until Hyunjin led them to a room upstairs, not liking to exert himself.

"You're still single, right?"

He took the lighter from his pocket, taking the flame and lighting the end of his blunt. "Yeah, I am." 

Hyunjin nodded, poking the male's shoulder. "Shame. I would've snatched you up in a heartbeat." He let Chan get a small puff before taking it back "anyways, gotta go check on the others."

Before he left the room, he held a hand on Chan's shoulder - leaning into his ear. "If you're ever feeling lonely, call me. I'd always pick up for you." He kissed Chan's cheek, patting his ass then leaving the room right after.

'I'm such a catch.' Chan dusted his own shoulders off, walking out of the room and into the hallways.

Everything was going fine until Chan started to hear noises coming from the room near him. Usually he'd ignore it, considering it was normal for people to fuck in the empty rooms but this time Chan was bothered by it. His own frustration cutting off his judgment and bringing him to the door - banging on the wood.

"Can you guys shut up?! I'm trying to re-" The door opened a little, Changbin filling up the open space in between the door.

"Oh hey, Chan, what's up?"

Chan's mouth opened and closed, trying to form words that he just couldn't do at the movement. "Um- I- Well uh." 

Changbin's hair was a mess, his lips were swollen, and not to mention the fact that he wasn't even wearing a shirt. "What? Hurry up, will ya? Kinda busy here."

He opened the door wider, letting Chan get a glimpse of some girl practically naked on the bed.

He did not like the view right now.

"O-Oh! I didn't know that y-" 

Changbin looked over his shoulder "Yeah man, can we have this conversation later? I'm kind of in the middle of this so..." He gave Chan a thumbs up then closed the door in his face.

'We haven't talked in days and this is the first thing he says to me?' Chan didn't know whether to cry or punch the wall. He held a hand over his mouth, leaning on the wall to support himself.

'I need to go. I can't stay here.'

Chan stumbled as he walked, crashing into the wall and falling onto the floor a few times. '

What did I do wrong? What does she have that I don't?' 

Chan sobbed into his hands, just barely making it down the stairs. "Chan! Are you alright?!" Hyunjin made his way past groups of people and helped Chan off the floor, dusting off his pants.

"I-I have to leave. Please get Minho home safely for me." He pushed Hyunjin aside and practically ran to the front door, throwing it open and inhaling the fresh air.

Chan walked home, in and out of consciousness but he got there eventually.

He fell onto his bed, fully clothed and all, and buried his head under his pillows. "It won't stop." Chan snapped his favorite pair of headphones to his ears, playing music on full volume. 

Nothing he did stopped the small voices whispering in his ear - telling him that he'd never be enough for Changbin. That he would never want him or even look his way again.

And you know what? He was starting to believe it. 

『••✎••』

I like shrimp. 

Has nothing to do with anything but felt like sharing with ya'll  

[1054 Words]