controlled

chapter three

Word count: 1172 

HARRY POV:

It had happened so fast. One moment Harry and Louis were posing the next Louis was blacked out against his chest. He knew if he had said something to their managers he would get lectured about not showing enough effort or just something along those lines. So naturally, he pulled Louis's arm over his shoulders and headed for the back door.

"going out for a break, give us 20 minutes." Harry pushed past Louis's manager's stares until he got around the corner. Carefully Harry pulled the shorter boy's legs around his waist and carried him outside. He slowly sat down against the cold brick wall, not letting go of Louis. He rested his head on the boy, listening to his breathing and the cars driving past, harry wasn't going to admit it but he was quite comfortable, even if he was pretty much cuddling a guy.

"H-Harry, why are we outside? And why are we-" Louis's eyes scanned over Harry's.

"you passed out or something in there, so I took you here, I uh didn't want to wake you so I just left you on me." Louis pushed his hair behind his ear, Harry could feel his heart beating like mad.

"Does anyone like know?" Louis whispered, harry heard the distress in his voice.

"uh no one knows, you know our managers would freak. Um are you okay Lou?" he said making eye contact with Louis.

"Lou?" he smiled, "oh sorry I didn't-" Harry started before getting cut off.

"no, it's okay, I like it. But you have to let me call you... Haz" Harry rolled his eyes and nodded. Lou smiled again this time Harry felt like he had melted, it wasn't the smile he had seen in the shop it was different, it felt real.

"uh we better get back" Harry couldn't handle all these feelings at once, he lifted Lou off his lap and walked back inside.

"O-okay" he heard Louis call back.

The rest of the shoot only lasted about 15 minutes, and that 15 minutes was filled with thoughts of Lou.

"Why didn't I just let him go, I hope he doesn't think I'm gay, what if he's gay..." Harry's mind trailed off with thoughts of nothing other than Louis. He had been thinking so hard his head began to pound. Although he didn't have any medicine he did have smokes, and they did bout the same thing for him. Straight after the last photo was taken harry sped off towards the dressing room, avoiding Louis at all costs. He fiddled around in his bag for about 30 seconds before finding his newly bought pack of cigarettes. He wandered around to the back, surprisingly not seeing Louis on his way, he must have left already. Harry was wrong because sitting in the same spot they were before was Louis, he sat with a smoke in his right hand and he had his eyes locked on a small group of finches in a tree nearby. Harry didn't want it to be obvious that he trying to avoid him, so he quietly sat down beside Louis. He lit one of his smokes and smiled a weak smile across to Lou hoping he hadn't noticed his bi panic from earlier.

"feeling better?" Harry gasped as he felt himself move closer to Louie, hopefully, he didn't notice. Louis's hands shifted in his lap.

"Yeah, 'm better. I'm going back to my place soon to have pizza, wanna join? Y-You don't have to if you don't want." he mumbled. Without thinking Harry's head began to nod. Louie stood up and smiled down at Harry holding out his hand to help him up. If Harry wasn't panicking already he definitely was now.

"he can't pull me up, I'm too heavy. He won't like me if he knew I was heavy..." while the thoughts swam through his head Lou stood patiently in front of him, still with his arm extended.

"Haz?" his eyes snapped up. Harry wasn't going to have the shorter boy use so much effort to pull someone up like him, slowly he pulled himself up onto his feet and worked his way next to the door.

"coming?"

Louis' house was rather large like his, instead, his was less modern and more cottage-like. Lou fumbled with the door for a few seconds before walking in. The walls were covered in records, CDs and posters of famous people and bands. Harry watched as Louis walked over to his record player and slid a record on. Harry liked the vibe the records gave off, it felt so much different from the music on his phone.

"uh so yeah, this is it. Not much but it's home." Lou said scratching his head nervously.

'Home'. Harry wondered what that felt like. He followed Lou to the kitchen and lent against the bench.

"It's nice here, way better than my place for sure." He said finally. it was true, harry much rather Louie's than his own.

"You think so, I mean I haven't been to your house yet so I wouldn't know what to say ahah"

"yet? So, does he want to come over, it was he just saying that?" Harrys mind was racing with questions, in fact, it has been filled up so much since he first met Louis.

"oh yeah I guess we should order some pizza, I don't know how long it's going to take to get here so. What's your favourite?" Harry shrugged, to be honest, he wasn't going to eat anything, he just didn't feel like being by himself.

"I'll just order pepperoni, because come on, who doesn't like it." While Lou was ordering, Harry made his way over to the couch and sat himself down.

"it's always have and never hold, you began to feel like, hommmeeee yeah...

What's mine is yours to leave or take, What's mine is yours to make your ownnn."

"look after you the fray, right?" harry had heard this song a few times on the radio, he never really took notice of how good it was till now.

"Yeah, one of my favourites. My old band and I would sing it a lot." He smiled down at his hands.

"no way, you were in a band too? In school, I was in one called the White Eskimo. We all just stopped talking after school. What happened to yours?" For once Harry was actually interested in a conversation with someone.

"My band was also in school, we were called, The Rouge, look I even have it tattooed on my ankles." Lou pulled up the ends of his pants to reveal the name written in bold. "and I got kicked out by the main guitarist, I think he was jealous I was talking all the glory, his loss though." He couldn't help but laugh.

"if I was him, id never let you go." He laughed again before realising what he just said.

"Y-You wouldn't?" Lou's eyes began to tear up.

"I wouldn't," Harry said quietly before doing something he thought he'd never do.  

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30/09/2021

-kaitie xx