4- Deep into you [Reviewer Sasha]

28 5 5
                                    

Reviewer Sasha TAEis4JUNGKOOK

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.


Reviewer Sasha TAEis4JUNGKOOK

Author:: kimsuga86

Title:: Deep into you||KTH

Title:: ⅗

The title is a bit unique. It's not simple. Because if it was a normal love story then the title would have been "deep in love with you" or something like that. But "deep into you" gives you many ideas and different scenarios as to how the story will be. And that is a plus point.

Cover:: 8/10

I liked the cover. It totally matches with Taehyung's character in the beginning of the story. But if you used a psycho Taehyung picture, then it would have already revealed what the story will be about, which you thankfully did not do.

Blurb:: 5/10

Instead of writing "What is this flower? It's beautiful", write it as "what's the name of this flower? It's beautiful."

Then, "don't touch it, it's poisonous. I snapped at her." Just remove the "as she startled back at me" because it did not fight right with the sentence at all.

Then, instead of "you're a purity with a sweet and innocent beauty", change it to "you're a pure, sweet and oh so innocent beauty."

Other than that, the length of your blurb was perfect.

First impression:: ⅗

I'll be honest. I didn't really expect anything from your book. Because the mistakes in your blurb kinda killed the vibe for me to read. But I still opened it because of the title and the cover that attracted me, intrigued me.

Plot:: 15/20

 What a plot twist near the end. I didn't expect that at all. I mean he did give some hints in the beginning but maybe I couldn't catch it because I was so into the story. Like when he said "I only want lily", "lily is mine, you are mine", it showed that he's obsessed with Lily.

Flow:: 6/10

The flow of your story was smooth. The connection between one chapter to the next one was really nice and precise in some or the other way. But it made sense. It was all balanced well.

Grammar/vocabulary:: 5.5/10

I've noticed that there were very few spelling mistakes. But the sentence formation was a bit wrong. Like the usage of certain words which made the whole sentence sound different. Like the one in your blurb. I would suggest you to use an app called "Grammarly", it'll help you in spelling, pronunciation and grammar. Trust me, it'll help a lot.

Emotions:: 8/10

It seriously gave me such Psycho vibes ಥ‿ಥ i didn't see any emotional drama or anything like that but instead of that, psycho emotions. You know what I mean right? At the beginning Tae seemed like such a good boy but later near the end, wow what a turn. Loved that.

Character development:: 6/10

I did not see any character development. Instead Taehyung just became more and more obsessed with Lily to the point that he even kidnapped? her and hid her in his basement. 

About Lily, instead of confronting Jungkook and asking whether he really cheated on her or not, she ran away to her friend. And now she's in Taehyung's basement.

Sure, you described the feelings and inner conflicts of Taehyung really well, but would have been better if you even added Lily's thoughts.

Writing style:: 7/10

Though I liked the way you have written and it had a flow, I would suggest you to have a constant length in every chapter. Like if the first chapter is very long, it will be better if all the chapters are also very long. If the first chapter is short, then all the chapters should be long. One long chapter, then a short chapter, it kills the vibe a bit. At Least for me.

Enjoyment:: ⅘

 To be frank, I enjoyed your book. I liked the way you have written it, the book cover which is very pretty, the title which pulled me in, Taehyung's obsessed psycho kinda character, I loved it. Keep it up.

Overall:: 3/5

______________________________________

Hope you will take our words marks into consideration and will let us see a better version soon.

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
𝙲𝚁𝙸𝚃𝙸𝙲𝚂_𝙰 𝚁𝚎𝚟𝚒𝚎𝚠 𝚂𝚑𝚘𝚙Where stories live. Discover now