Tiny Little Details (bxb)

chapter eighteen

Milo's family was only a breakfast family when it was someone's birthday. On special occasions, for example their only son's seventeenth birthday, they would go all out. Milo sat at the dining room table, eagerly awaiting the pancakes he could smell from the kitchen. The aroma wafted through the joint room and was filling Milo with a sense of anticipation. He had a lot to be excited about today, for one, his parents had given him some pretty sweet gifts that he was beyond grateful for and he had an entire afternoon to spend with Jamie; just the two of them. That was the part of the day he was anticipating the most, thought he'd never say it out loud. Milo was sure his parents thought they were just hanging out, and they were, but it was more than that.

"Happy birthday, Milo!" His mom spoke, carrying a plate of fluffy buttermilk pancakes into the room and setting them down in front of him. There was only one candle, which Milo was thankful for. There had to be some sort of hazard for having seventeen lit candles on a stack of unbalanced pancakes.

Milo looked up at his parents and Amelia, who said impatiently next to him, waiting to be served, "Thanks guys."

They waited expectantly for him to blow out his candle, "Any wishes this year?" Dad spoke, taking a seat.

Milo shrugged, "Nothing specific."

Milo knew deep down that his words were a lie because there was one specific thing he longed for. He desperately wanted him and Jamie to be okay after what happened the night before. Milo was beyond nervous for the day ahead and hoped that any awkwardness between the two of them would fade quickly. Of course, Milo needed to apologise for what he's said. The words rolled off his tongue before he realised what he said, and by then, it was too late to take them back. Truth is, Milo didn't want to see anyone else besides Jamie and he prayed that Jamie felt the same...and if he did last night, Milo hoped he still would today when he came to pick him up. He still wondered how he'd managed to screw things up with Jamie before they really began. Well, they had begun but they were still getting to know each other, they were still in the beginning of their...relationship? Whatever it was. It was confusing. They hadn't worked that out yet. Hopefully, if things went the way Milo hoped, everything would be out in the open and they could finally figure out what they were to each other, once and for all. Jamie and Milo were deep in the honeymoon phase, when everything was fun and light-hearted, nothing was difficult. No fights, no squabbles. As of last night, that bubble had burst.

Milo wasn't necessarily ready for a real relationship with Jamie, but he was certainly ready for the next step; the next level. He was too consumed by his infatuation with Jamie to even comprehend what Milo preferred in terms of his sexuality, he didn't feel the need to label himself just yet, though he had started to really think about it. There had to be a reason that he'd never found himself overly attracted to girls, but then as soon as Jamie came along...it was like a switch flipped in an instant. Milo could be gay. He could be bi. He certainly wasn't straight. Milo didn't really know, but hey, he was seventeen, do seventeen-year-old's really know anything? The boys had only known each other so long, maybe two months; give or take, and they'd only been romantically involved for just over a month. Milo was getting a little tired of all the sneaking around and acting nonchalant when they were with other people. Then again, he was scared shitless to tell people the truth...whatever that was.

It was all very confusing. Milo seemed to always be in a state of confusion these days, in fact, he wondered when he'd ever have a clear head.

"So, what are your plans for today?" Mom spoke, pouring maple syrup over her pancakes.

Milo smiled, "Jamie's taking me somewhere, not sure though."

"Oh yeah? What about Paige?" Dad asked, forking at his plate.