Sweetest Sin||BookOne

Unsure Love

Reece

"Absolutely not!" Madison shouts with every ounce of strength she can muster, I'm sure. She's sitting on the side of the bed, her arms folded, eyes averted. I'm kneeling in front of her with a solemn look on my face. I've just told her that I'm going back to Houston with Jameson, and her reaction was exactly what I expected. 

"Maddy, baby-"

"Do not Maddy me!" She shouts again before turning her gaze to Jameson who is standing behind me. "And you selfish asshole! Why would you take him back to the fucking city when you know people are out to get him?!" 

"You think I would really let anything happen to him?" Jameson says with a hint of annoyance in his voice. 

"You are not God! You can't control everything that everybody does. It's stupid of you to believe so!" 

"I am very aware that I am not God! But I have the men and the resources to keep us both alive. Quite frankly, you not trusting me and my skill-set is offending." 

"Bullshit Jameson. This is my fucking husband we are talking about! The love of my life!" Madison says as she stands. Kylen is sitting beside her and before Madison can get too worked up, he pulls her back down to sit. 

"You think I don't love him," Jameson whispers out and I turn my head to look at him. I'm sure he sees the shock on my face. "You think I don't love you? I'd move heaven and earth to have you both. The three of you but I'm not going to keep doing this." He says with so much conviction. I swallow thickly as Madison pushes pass me to go toe to toe with Jameson. She still sick but her anger is overriding her weak body. 

"Doing what, Jay? What are you not going to keep doing?" Madison sneers. 

"You say you want me to be a part of this. You say you want Kylen to be a part of this, when honestly, Madison, I don't even think you know what you want. I'm with the two of you, and have been for weeks, because I want you both. If you say you want me, can you please try your damn best to make me feel it. You doubt me at every turn. I'd never put Reece or any of you in harms way. Do you understand that?" Madison is silent for a minute and I turn around to see her clenching her jaw. Her fist are bald up at her side, but when I see the first tear roll down her perfect cheek, I stand and pull her into my chest. 

"Maybe I shouldn't go." I say to Jameson, but neither of them acknowledge that I've said anything. 

"Maybe you shouldn't." Jameson finally says before letting out a heavy sigh. "And maybe this whole, relationship shouldn't happen." I don't say a word. It's not really my place to. No matter how much I want this to happen, no matter how much I know Madison has wished for this, it can all stop now. All Jameson has to do it walk away from it or Madison say she doesn't want this anymore. 

"You don't understand." Madison finally grits out through clenched teeth. 

"What don't I understand?" Jameson retorts. "I understand that you two have been married for seven years and I've known you for less than a month, but I love you both. I understand that this isn't something that I asked for. I understand that despite how unsure about this I was, I went in head first. Now you, Madison, are telling me that I don't understand the depths of your love for Reece? Woman I know you'd kill anyone who threaten to harm him, including me. I know you'd do things you don't even want, just to see his amazing smile. I know far more than you give me credit for." 

"How do you know any of this, when I've never told you!" I flinch when my wife screams. "You're just saying what you know I want to hear!" Her voice breaks and my heart squeezes so tight in my chest that it hurts. 

"No! You amazing, beautiful, stubborn woman! I know all of this because I watch peoples actions! I see how they speak and treat those that they say they love and I form an opinion! I've seen how you worship your husband. I've seen how you worship me! And I know from that, how you'll worship Kylen! You are full of love, and you want to share it as long as everyone participating is okay with it! I know you Madison, I. Know. You. The both of you, all three of you and I know you all because I was meant to love every single one of you! So let me! Give me that chance or I'm fucking out!" Jameson storms towards the room door, only to stop inches from it, with his back to us. "I'm going alone. If I don't make it back, you all will be taken care of," he says and then he's gone and I'm not sure why but the dam behind my eyes breaks open with a force I can't control.  

I'm up on my feet heading for the door but Madison grabs my hand and yanks. Her strength surprises me since I know she's still sick. Yet, that doesn't stop something inside of me from snapping. 

"No!" I shout and snatch my hand away. Cradling my temples between my palms, I groan in frustration. "Look," I sigh. "Baby, I love you and I'll do whatever makes you happy but there is something you need to understand. I'm not your child, I'm your lover, your husband, the man who can't be without you but what's happening right now, is everything that you wanted! YOU! So, why can't you be happy? Why are you consistently second guessing everything? Why do you feel that Jameson isn't enough!" 

"I never said that!" Madison shouts back. 

"You don't have to say it when you actions prove as much." I reply as I exhale loudly. "If you don't want this type of relationship, just say that. But you can't keep toying with Jameson's emotions. You either want him and now Kylen , or you fuck them, then let them be. I'm going with Jameson. I'll see you when I get back, and I expect you to know exactly what you want. And understand that I will stick with you. No one else." I walk up to my wife, kiss her lips, then leave to follow after a man that I'm afraid I'll never be able to let go.

 Damn, this shit is getting complicated.