Love Awaited

Before I met you

Beam POV

Mama wondered why the mysterious gifts suddenly stopped coming but she didn't pressed it when she saw that my mood switched immediately. She probably thinks that I was still affected with my split with Tian and I had no plans to correct her. Yes, I was still affected but not that much anymore. The bigger reason was the succession from Tian to Forth.

But for some forsaken reason, Forth himself began to personally visit me at the hospital. I ignored him. He didn't insist on speaking to me. He'll just simply come by. If at times he'll talk to me and I won't reply, he'll just sit down at the reception area until the end of my shift. After that, he'll follow me until I ride a public transport safely.

After two weeks of doing that daily, I noticed that he's been getting thinner. That's why one night, while he's following me to the terminal, I suddenly pulled him inside one of the restaurants along the way. He was startled but he didn't say anything.

"What happening to you?" I asked worried. I got even more concerned when I noticed that he had black spots around his eyes. It was evident that he had been depriving himself of sleep. Even though I was still pissed at the thought of being another rebound, I'm not a monster. First, I'm a health care professional. And the person in front of me was a patient.

"Whatever you say, bitch. Whatever that will convince you." A part of my brain scoffed but I ignored it.

"I told myself that I will never beg for you to love me. I'm not doing just that, begging for people to love me. But here I am forcing myself to you." He said with sad eyes.

I felt the utmost sincerity of his words but of course I was scared. Tian was serious with me before too. But in the end, he left me when he finally had the chance with P'Phupha. I don't want a deja vu.

"I'm not ready to gamble my heart again, Forth. Not for you, not for anyone. But especially, not for you. I don't want to end up hating you. I don't want to end up hating P'Phupha for hood. You're both good people, I know. But I am not a thing that you place to plug the holes in your hearts."

"I'm not Tian..." He murmured.

I gave him a sad smile and shook my head. He didn't speak after that.

Even though the atmosphere became heavy, I still tried to force him to eat. He didn't really complain and just finished everything I ordered for him. But we still argued when it was time to pay. He wasn't able to do anything when I paid for the food nonetheless.

"Wouldn't you even give me a chance?" He said to me before we went on separate ways.

"Are you really asking me that question?" I said before I turned around and walked away. I closed my eyes when I didn't hear any footsteps trailing behind me.

That was the last time I saw Forth in the hospital. Even P'Phupha was avoiding me. I just learned from Misty and Anita that Forth planned to return to the Middle East. I also found out that when he started sending me those gifts, he was about to resign from his work to permanently live in the country.

Honestly, part of me wanted to think that it was his grand gesture for me. But that fantasy is easily shattered with the fact that P'Phupha also lives here. I mean, I already achieve my quota for love stupidity. I don't want to add more stupidity to that list.

Perhaps, after dogging me for a while, I got used to his presence and I found replacements for that from the teddy bears he gave me. Mama didn't want to gave them away so we had a cabinet made to house them. But my mother is such an OC that she placed labels on the date that I received them.

Suddenly, I noticed something about the bears. They were wearing the native costumes and flags of all the places I want to travel to. Washington, Brazil, Santorini, Moscow, New Zealand, London, Ireland, and more. Then another fact hit me!

I opened my Facebook account. I recalled that I posted in my wall the places I wanted to travel. I posted it three months before P'Phupha's 25th birthday. I just started with my employment then and I vowed to save up and travel to all those places in the future.

I was even more dumbstruck when I saw one of Anita's posts that tagged me. It was a list of flowers. There was a time that Anita and I held a contest as to who can list down names of flowers the most.  We just had our field trip in one of the biggest plantations up north and I was determined to win. I even cheated and googled some names. Haha!

I recalled all the flowers I ever received from Forth. Even the brands of all the chocolate he sent. Those were the things I posted on my wall and said I wanted to taste them. The items that mama received, I posted them saying that I will buy them for her too. But I posted all those information before I even met Forth.

I automatically called P'Phupha. There was a tinge of uncertainty when he answered. "Beam, can you just call me later? I'm driving Forth to the airport."

"GAWD DAMN IT PHI! If you don't turn that car around and drive directly to my house this instant, I will ran you over myself and will make sure that you will die this time!" I exclaimed. It didn't even occur to me that I don't have a car. Haha!

"Are you sure?" He asked, still unconvinced.

"NOW!" I screamed again.

Mama rushed to my room because of all my shouting. When I saw her, I broke down instantly. My mind was in a whirlwind. Meanwhile, my mother babbled non-sense in the hope to woo me down. My eyes darted one at a time to all the teddy bears that Forth gave. It was the first time that someone actually tried to research what I wanted to do, where I wanted to go, or what I wanted to eat. Even Tian was not that in love with me to that kind of gesture. But the Prince of Darkness who had done nothing but to annoy me did gave me what I wanted. It was like he knew me before I met him.

"That jerk is truly a devil incarnate," I mumbled to myself.

I just finished crying when P'Phupha's car parked out front. When he stepped down, Forth was behind him with his head low.

My mother was on attack mode as soon as she saw them. Well, we were alone again in our house so she's being overprotective. "If you're going to hurt my son again, get out of here now!"

"Ma! Don't overreact! This is not some lakorn on TV!" I castigated her. Her mother hen attitude kicked in again and even followed P'Phupha, Forth, and I in my room.

No choice then. So as soon as we entered, I had the two guest face laptop screen. P'Phupha creased his forehead while Forth deflected his gaze as color was slowly stripping from his face. Moments later, P'Phupha burst out laughing.

"Seriously?" P'Phupha asked in between chuckles. 

"I know right. He's such a stalker." I doubled down. The jerk glared at me.

"Wait..." P'Phupha trailed and looked at the posts again. 

I opened them in different tabs for easy navigation. I was prepared for war! 

"This was months before you two met." P'Phupha added, obviously trying to tease Forth more.

"Exactly! Again, stalker!" 

The jerk couldn't help but defend himself. "Why do you care?"

"Of course I care mister! I'm the one you're stalking. How would I know you don't have some evil plan against me?" I repulsed back. 

The jerk just got all flustered. And he didn't fucking deny that he indeed had an evil plan against me! UGH!

"Wow! That's what you call pride Beam, if you don't know." He tried fighting back but we all knew he was cornered.

"Does he really have any say on this?" P'Phupha asked.

Forth diverted his glaring eyes phi. 

Unfortunately, it had no effect and phi's smile turned into a more devious smirk. "Is this the reason why you suddenly went home on my birthday that year?" 

If I thought Forth couldn't get any redder, I was wrong. I didn't cut into the interrogation. It's there moment. Besides, I wanted to focus on my kilig feelings. On the other hand, my mother, in a true evidence for miracles, was silent. She just stood by the door listening to the conversation.