Jay's Journey

Chapter 5

Zira was the key to travelling in the woods. Once she had her mind set on finding a clearing or river crossing, she always found it soon. Every fallen log and labyrinth of bushes was easier to navigate when she had spotted it. They stopped for water whenever they found a fast moving stream, and they stopped to gather food at every body of water or in evening.

And so, it was evening. There was a rocky clearing next to a fast flowing stream. Jay sat upon a rock, prodding the power of Maea as he always did, trying to evoke a response. Vayen also sat there, and Jay tried to pretend Vayen's eyes weren't locked on him in a glare.

There was no explanation for it. Vayen disliked Jay. That was fact, and to Jay, it was almost painfully obvious. What he had done to draw Vayen's ire was a mystery. Was it his lack of ability to call magic on command? That would make sense, as it frustrated Jay to no end as well. Could it be...

Jay softly gasped as the possibility entered his mind. Was Vayen's animosity directed at the way he presented himself. It was a drastic change, and Vayen did stop talking to him around that time, but how unreasonable would that be?

Jay wanted to ask, to speak up and make him stop. But, he would just get angry and scream and shout until Jay was quiet again. Maybe it would be best to wait until Zira was back? No, this was between Jay and Vayen, and it would stay that way. He couldn't afford the group to fall apart now of all times.

Jay had to do something and make it stop.

"Uh, Vayen?" He asked trepidatiously.

"What?" Vayen replied, his tone undeniably annoyed.

"Why do you keep glaring at me? You uh, do it a lot." Jay observed.

"I'm not glarin'! The fuck d'ya mean?" Vayen asked.

"Uh..." This was a mistake, Vayen wasn't going to admit to it. Now, he was going to glare and it's all because Jay had to make a scene out of nothing. Great.

"You always stare at me, in a... angry way." Jay managed.

"Huh?"

"I would like to know why." Jay continued. Vayen scoffed. Jay wildly fidgeted with the fabric of his blouse, what was that response supposed to mean? Vayen didn't give a response.

"I said, I'd like to know why!" Jay repeated more firmly.

"It's 'cuz ya look dumb as fuck!" Vayen shouted in response.

"Why? I think there's more!!"

"You're a boy dressin' as a girl! Skirts?! Girly shirts?! You're a fucking boy, Jay. You're gonna be a man soon so start actin' like one!" Jay stopped. It was an echo of every reminder that his mind gave him. He looked ridiculous, he was a boy. He didn't act like other boys, so he should. But, how did Vayen know that? He couldn't, so why were the two the same? Jay's eyes widened as he realized it.

Maybe it wasn't him or Vayen who came up with those things, who decided them. Someone else did, and everyone just repeated after them. Why did a boy dressing as a girl look ridiculous? What even was ridiculous?

"I left home so I could act however I wanted." Jay said.

"Just 'cuz ya can put on a skirt doesn't mean you should!" Vayen snapped.

"We're thieves, Vayen! We've fought back against guards! But me wearing a skirt is where you draw the fucking line?! You know, I put up with all your bullshit. You shout and act aggressive and actively put us in danger and I put up with that. That's fine because I've realized that's who you are. But here you are, unable to put up with me for wearing a fucking blouse! How self centered can you possibly be?! How can you expect me to put up with you when you can't put up with me!" Jay screamed, fists clenching his blouse until his knuckles were white. Vayen was left speechless.