Rising From The Ashes (Book Five of the Bad Wolf Chronicles)

The Lodgers

Oh, dear Lord, I was trying so hard not to laugh when I was writing this! I'm sure I looked scary to my grandmother when I kept snorting and snickering and grinning in really weird places.

But, also . . . thanks to fxtzsimmons for recognizing the hint I gave last interlude . . . Fitz and Amy knew each other when they were younger! :D

Anyway, I should warn you now . . . innuendo overload ahead. ;)

Here comes "The Lodgers!"

***

The Doctor poked his head out of the TARDIS and stepped outside. "No, Amy, it's definitely not the fifth moon of Cindie Colesta," he said.

Jessie frowned as she stepped out. "Is that a Ryman's?" she asked, pointing.

Something inside the TARDIS exploded, and the TARDIS dematerialized suddenly. "Amy!" the Doctor shouted. "Amy!"

Jessie ran around, trying to see if the TARDIS would land anywhere else, before huffing and folding her arms. "She's gone."

The Doctor sighed and rubbed his face with his hand.

They were stuck.

***

However, as luck would have found them, they found an ad for someone looking for a lodger. So they packed what little they had, Jessie taking a few Bluetooth earpieces for them, the Doctor with a paper bag of money, and knocked on the door of the house, waiting for Craig Owens, the man looking for the lodger, lived. "I love you!" they could hear the man say faintly before he opened the door suddenly. "I love you!" He paused, blinking, looking at the two of them. "I love you," he finished faintly.

Jessie raised an eyebrow. "I guess we've made a good first impression. Nice to meet you. We're your new lodgers."

"This is going to be easier than we expected!" the Doctor grinned, taking the fluffy pink key ring Craig was holding in his hand.

"But, I only put the advert up today!" Craig sputtered, staring at the floppy-haired man in a tweed jacket, braces, and a bow tie, and the girl with dark hair and bangs braided back, wearing a black camisole tank top under an off the shoulder off white loose shirt, hot pink skirt with a black belt and gold buckle, black leggings, and black heeled boots. "I didn't put my address!"

"Well, aren't you lucky we came along?" the Doctor grinned. "More lucky than you know. Less of a young professional, more of an ancient amateur, but believe me, she's an absolute dream."

"He's biased," Jessie whispered with a wink.

"Hang on a minute, mates," Craig shook his head. "I don't know if I want you staying! And give me back those keys! You can't have those!"

Jessie tossed the keys back. "Yes, quite right," the Doctor nodded. "Have some rent." He gave Craig the bag. "That's probably quite a lot, isn't it?" he asked as Craig stared inside the bag, his eyes wide. "Looks like a lot. Is it a lot? I can never tell."

"And to think, that's only just scraping the top of my SHIELD account," Jessie joked as they went inside.

"Don't spend it all on sweets, unless you like sweets," the Doctor warned Craig. "Except this one. I love this sweet."

"Don't call me a sweet," Jessie shook her head.

"Yes, dear," the Doctor nodded before his eyes lit up. "Ooo . . . " He gave Craig two Gallic kisses. "That's how we greet each other nowadays, isn't it? I'm the Doctor. Well, they call me the Doctor. I don't know why. I call me the Doctor, too. Still don't know why."