the marriage of jerry and garold

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HUIADHIUSHJNKAHcm twistednoglastia has an amazing fan fiction, go fucking read it 

this is based off of a HC I shared and I- its chaotic okay?

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     Y/N's eyes were filled with tears as her wither skulls, Jerry and Garold, floated down the isle. The entire SMP was here for the occasion, especially as all of them had known the skulls to be close friends after they had brutally destroyed their homeland.

      The isle was decorated with black and blood red silk banners, strung between around 12 banisters that lined the small pathway. The floor was coated in a delicate silk, trimmed to perfection. Long benches were on either side, each and every chair filled with a member of the SMP. Not a single person wanted to miss this event. Even fucking Ninja came. Fucking. Ninja.

     Tommy was loudly blasting Animal Crossing music instead of the classical music normally played at a wedding, much to Niki's dismay. She thought a wedding between two floating skulls would be normal. Yeah, she's crazy like that. 

     Technoblade strutted down the isle, throwing fingers. Instead of a flower girl, they had a finger girl. I- That sounds so weird, but just go with it, please. Narrowly dodging the severed fingers, Y/N turned her head to see her two favorite wither skulls floating down the isle.

     The Animal Crossing music was swapped out for something more fitting; Sweden by 3418.

     Slowly floating towards the random ass log that was there instead of whatever a preach stands infront of at a wedding, the two skulls turned towards each other, flat faced. They're fucking skulls, they can't make expressions anyways. Idiots. I bet you were expecting me to make them smile. Ha, fuck you.

     For some reason, someone hired Quackity as the priest. Y/N couldn't complain though, motherfucker was hilarious.

     "Alright, everybody! I've never been a priest or ever been to a wedding, so I'm just going to say whatever I want! Got it?" Alex loudly shouted over the extremely loud music. "Anyways!"

     "We're all here to experience the union between these two floating wither skulls, Jerry and Garold! Don't ask me to tell you who is who!" Flipping the page in a non-existent book, Quackity continued.

     "Do you uh- whatever, I don't care. Uhhh...skull on the left! Do you something or other vow yourself blah blah to your husband? Like, the I do thing?"

     Silence rang out, the deafening Minecraft music being the only thing keeping the area from being completely quiet. 

     "Okay, I'll take that as an I do! Someone, I don't know- do you something I do to your husband?"

     Another silence. Apparently, floating skulls with no conscious can't speak either. Why were they getting married again?

     "Okay! Uh- kiss or something!" Alex began clapping.

     The two skulls floated towards each other, throwing each other completely off course as they hit each other in the face. Wither skull bullets began flying through the air, almost hitting several people. A scream or two rang out, but they were mostly silenced by the obnoxious clapping from the other members of the SMP. How charming.

     Y/N dragged herself to the front of the lane, grabbing both of her wither skulls my the tops of their heads. Forcing them to calm down, everyone resumed the schedule and moved Ono the afterparty.

---

     The after party was somehow even worse than the actual wedding.

     Alex was offering people "happy powder" on a log, Tommy was blasting Terraria music even louder than he had been playing the Minecraft music, and Foolish was trying to make fireworks with his lightning. Of course, you can't make fireworks out of literal lightning, so every so often, each member got struck with a small jolt of lightning. Y/N was pretty sure Sam had died around 6 times during the past 20 minutes alone due to his golden armor, which he had worn underneath his suit. It looked terrible, but it is what it is.

     Niki was offering weirdly colored cupcakes, which wasn't a rarity for her nowadays. Jack was hyping up her cupcakes, while Tubbo vomited in the nearby McPuffy's. Y/N didn't want to be the one to clean that up, so she moved as far as she could from the building. Hannah was braiding roses into Techno's hair while Phil laughed at him, getting daisies woven into his hair by Vikkstar. Apparently, Vikk knows how to braid hair.

     Fundy was in literał fear in the corner, tail fluffed up further than Y/N had ever seen it fluffed before. Wilbur and GhostSchlatt were having a drinking contest in the corner, but everything GhostSchlatt was drinking was just ending up on the floor due to him being a literal phantom. Bakugo was hyping the two up, even threatening them with blowing their faces off if they didn't drink more. Pop off, king.

     Ranboo was sitting awkwardly to the side as him and Todoroki talked about how awkward it was when someone asked about their multicolored hair, since both of them had the coloring naturally. Midoriya was viciously scribbling in his book, tearing through the backside in some places. Only DreamXD knows what the fuck he's doing in there.

     Jirou had her earplugs shoved into a random block of sound cancelling foam. Honestly, Y/N wished she could do the same. For some reason, Aizawa was invited as well. He was drinking from a bright red cup, and looked absolutely wasted. He was looking at his hands with utter disgust, thinking thoughts nobody sober would ever think.

     Karl was making out with Sapnap in the corner. Good for them, I guess. Mina and Ururaka were talking about swimsuits and gold clubs at one of the few tables that wasn't flipped over, or at least that's what Y/N thought she had heard over the loud yelling and music.

     Mineta was trying to look up Badboyhalo's skirt, not realizing that underneath was literally just a fucking void. Skippy was biting his ankles, somehow being shorter than even the literal child sized nugget of a pervert. Antfrost was chatting it up with Koda, with Tokoyami enjoying the animalistic company. George was sitting alone, asleep.

     The other members were dancing it out on the dance floor, listening to a completely different song than the one Tommy was blasting, leading to an ugly mix of sounds.

      Dream was locked into a floating cell in the sky, with him getting a brunt of the clashing sounds with no sound cancellation. Ha. L. Fucking homeless teletubby.

---

     After a few hours, most of the afterparty guests had left, either back into their own worlds or just back home. Y/N was fucking grateful, as her ears felt like they were missing.

     Making the extensive trudge back home, Y/N summoned her newly-wed skull friends.

     "So, dumbasses. You got married. What next?"

     Silence, duh.

     "Okay, nice. Wait, you want your kid back? The fuck?" Pulling the skull mask off of her head, Y/N handed it back to Gerold, him gripping it tightly in his jaws. 

     Flying off of the nether bridge, Y/N watched as her beloved skulls flew away from her, deeper into the hellish dimension.

     With a somber expression, Y/N sat down criss-cross applesauce, mourning the loss of some of her greatest friends. They had helped her destroy both the USJ and L'Manhole, forming some great memories.

     Sighing, Y/N impatiently sat up, pulling two more skulls out of her bag.

     "Welp, hey guys. Jerry and Gerold just fucking left me, taking their son Karl with them. Motherfuckers need to realize there's nowhere for two floating nether skulls." Placing the two new skulls where her wither heads would be, the new skulls activated with a soft hum. 

     "Samantha and Cherry, huh? Nice names. Better than Jerry and Garold, the fucking traitors." Grabbing a third skull, Y/N placed it onto her face, replacing her mask. Her familiar gold markings placed themselves onto the new skull, matching the rest of her outfit. 

     Finishing her walk home, Y/N spent the rest of the trip pondering about how she had managed to upset two more skulls enough for them to distance themselves from her, just like the others.

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plot twist, y/n murders her kind for their heads and uses them until they hate her el oh el

BFKHDJAKDJLCM

1.3k words

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⏰ Last updated: Nov 04, 2021 ⏰

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