SAFE HAVEN, georgenotfound ✓

050

real life !

It was weird how quick something could change; like a change of the seasons, or a spike during an investigation. It was always unforeseen and unpredictable, but was never something that came and went like it was nothing.

There was a slight breeze in the air today, a tickle of the wind that nipped at George's pale skin. His cheeks and the bridge of his nose was tinted with the faintest pink, and he blew out a sigh as he leaned his forearms on the cool metal bar surrounding their balcony.

A dent in between his dark brows indicated that he was, at least a bit, agitated. George was usually very easy to read — he was probably one of the most expressionistic people that his friends knew. But when his mood was down, he hid it well.

So why was he out all alone while his friends were inside, seeming to have the time of their lives celebrating his belated birthday even without the celebrant himself?

It was a joint birthday party to celebrate both him and Niki. But it seemed only Niki was feeling celebrated tonight.

Another sigh slipped past his lips and he groaned in annoyance. Even his own mood was annoying himself. No wonder none of his friends wanted to be around him.

"This feels familiar,"

Her voice was soothing, prompting him to relax his tense shoulders. For a while, he shut his eyes as her voice echoed in his ears.

Everything changed, but she stayed the same.

She was still soft, caring Aspyn. She still smiled and laughed until her cheeks hurt so much that she held them with her palms. She had that comforting touch whenever their fingers brushed and there was always that spark of electricity that ran through his veins. She continued to wear her heart of gold on her sleeve and wore sweet kindness in her eyes.

She was still Aspyn, his Aspyn. The one he fell in love with, the one he loved. She was his person. There was no one else for him, not while she existed.

"It does," he glanced at her. She wore a timid smile as she approached, leaving an appropriate amount of space between them. Her hair had grown significantly since her time in London, he remembered her complaints about how it tended to grow back quickly. She was dressed in a light blue dress that ran down to her mid-thighs, scattered with small daises from top to bottom. It was very Aspyn.

"I suppose the tables have turned."

He watched as the side of her lip quirked upwards at his response. "I suppose so. So what's the birthday boy doing out all alone?"

George hummed, internally debating whether to tell the truth or shrug it off. It was about her, anyway. "I dunno.. I'm just kind of... I guess I needed a break from the whole party thing."

With a generally unreadable expression, she nodded. "I get that..." she trailed off.

Silence fell upon them. Swallowing his nervousness, he turned his body slightly towards her. "I'm really sorry, Aspyn." his voice almost broke right then and there, but he had to continue. Her eyes were wide, as if she knew the conversation they were about to have. "I fucking... I thought I..."

He shut his eyes, swallowing the large lump that was lodged in his throat. He was struggling to find the right words, now that the opportunity was in front of him.

"George," Aspyn swallowed, reaching a hesitant hand out to lightly grasp his forearm. His eyes flew open and she gave him a small, yet reassuring, grin, prompting him to continue.

"I-I thought I was doing the right thing. I felt like I was... drowning.. almost. And I didn't know how to make it stop. I didn't want to— the last thing I wanted to do was to bring you down my spiral with me."

"I didn't want to hurt you... but I know I did. And I don't expect you to forgive me, but I'm truly sorry." Tears were streaming down his cheeks, and with glassy eyes, Aspyn shoved her face into his chest as she wrapped her arms around him.

George let out a half-audible sob. "I'm so— fuck, I'm so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you."

"I know," Aspyn's voice was muffled through his clothing, but he heard her loud and clear. "I know. It's okay, I-I forgive you."

"But I don't... I don't know if this is what I want anymore.."

How could his heart break again, only seconds after the feeling of being replenished?

"What? What do you mean?"

"I just.." she sighed as she pulled away, not meeting his eyes. "I just.. I don't know, anymore."

"Aspyn, darling—"

"I felt like I was so sure about everything, but then we broke up, and I felt.. I felt so fucking lost without you. I needed all that time just to find myself again, because I didn't know who I was without you. And now that I... now that I finally feel like my life is back on track, you fly in without any noti—"

"I love you."

They both froze at George's sudden outburst. Surprisingly, she frowned, tears beginning to pool in her eyes. "That's unfair, George. You can't do that to me."

"I'm sorry!" George was crying too, but he was desperate. "I just— I couldn't let you go without telling you. I love you, Aspyn. I always have. I love your dumb jokes and your contagious smile, I love your voice and your words and your mind. I've loved you since the very start—"

"Stop!" she covered her ears, shaking her head. "Stop, I can't..." her voice fell into what was barely heard as a whisper.

George complied, standing stiffly across from her. This wasn't what he thought it would be like. In his perfect world, there were fireworks during his proclamation. She was in his arms, maybe he would spin her around, and they were laughing loudly in their moment of bliss.

But this was nothing like that, not at all. It felt like he was suffocating in a rainfall of both their tears.

"I'm sorry," his voice croaked as he stepped away.

It was ironic. The crying scene, the confession. The unwanted leave of a lover.

And again, the situation left them both in tears, longing for the same person that they seemed to have pushed away.

MIYA SPEAKS !

as promised, the update!
but um. umm. yeah. forgot
to mention it was a little sad LOL.

anyway haha see u next time! :D

love uuu sm. MWAH <3333