Never Lost

09 - Hilan

No one would ever believe me if I told them that I didn't enjoy what I do. I don't love flying – I mean of course I did, but every time I was in the air the world got a little bit darker. Everyone always wanted to know what it was to have wings and I was one of the lucky ones to find out. I was gifted. Maybe too gifted for my own good. Maybe just lucky, but I like to look on the bright side.

Talent only ever came with misery. Everything was either for my own good or there was some other reason that kept me latched to a grim reality.

I didn't get into dragon hunting to hurt people.

Hell, I didn't even do it to hurt dragons.

Matthias was the only one who braved the world with me. He was my companion when I had none. Something of a brother, or maybe a father...hell, at least a friend. Together we were the eye of the storm, so beautiful and dangerous; it was like the purest form of invincibility. In the sky away from the world, who out there could dare bring us down?

Of course, I loved dragons.

I wanted to save them, every single one of them. I wanted to take them to a better place – somewhere free of humans.

Ironically I wanted to send them back from the place they were ripped from in the first place. That world had no humans and that world was the world they were meant to be in.

I never did find out why portals were opening between our world and theirs – I was only ever the cleanup crew.

I never wanted to hurt anyone.

I never wanted to hurt anyone.

I never wanted to hurt anyone.

I.

Never.
Wanted.

To hurt.

...

I had turned my brother into a scene kid by the age of seven. He was a very loud person by that time; opinionated and tired of the world – as if he had lived through the great depression and had a thing to say about work ethic. Sometimes I half expected him to up and tell me how to do my taxes or take out another mortgage on our old house to pay the medical bills. I knew from very early on that he would be the death of himself – one way or another.

"Hiya, milkboy," I grinned whilst pulling back the curtains by his hospital bed to throw a stuffed lobster at his head. Lait shielded his face with his hands and laughed easily, his large eyes and crooked smile lighting up the grim hospital interior. He picked up the lobster and set it on his lap – he would have put it on the side table, but the spider web of tubes in his arms restricted him from moving too much. "What did the Doctor say about getting yourself all tangled up like this?"

Lait narrowed his eyes at me even though he knew he was pinned. "Don't be smart with me."

"At the rate you're going I won't be able to keep up." I replied and pulled my coat off to sit on his bedside. "So they said you can blow this joint tomorrow –" He sat up quickly but I pushed him right back. "—uh uh uh, but—"

I could see the scowl slowly burning into his soul as he sensed hinderances to his freedom.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "When the doctor says you must stay in bed for a few days, you have to do it. Okay? Please."