Cloaked Heart-Behrad Tarazi

England, 1977 Part 1

Six months later...

"We're the Smell!" Charlie yelled into the microphone. "You're a bunch of miners! And we'll be back when we feel like it!" Me, Charlie, Declan, Ian, and Gilly got off the stage, running outback as a fight had arisen in the pub. The only car in sight was a van and the police were gaining on us, so the five of us hopped in the van.

"Thanks for the lift, mate." Declan said to the man sitting in the driver's seat.

"Get us out of here!" I yelled at him, which he did.

XXX

"Oh, let me out. I'm gonna puke." Declan rushed out of the minivan as we reached our hideout.

"Don't let the suit fool you." I said to the band, referring to our driver who we Shanghaied into this drive. "Our man's a punk. Drove on the wrong side of the road the whole way here!"

"I did?"

"Nice." Charlie shook his hand. The remaining four of us got out and went inside.

XXX

There was a knock at the door and both Charlie and I went to answer it.

"What? We leave something in the van?" Charlie asked our driver who was stationed at the door.

"No, I, uh. Seeing as I drove you guys and you didn't pay me, I thought maybe I could hang out with you 'blokes.'" He said, doing a terrible accent on the last word. "Down with the monarchy, right?"

"We didn't catch your name." I told the man.

"Ray...ge." We both looked at him weirdly.

"Rayge?" Charlie asked him.

"Yep, Rayge, that's what they call me, on account of all my various rages against, um, the machine."

"Well, we'd like to see some rage, Rayge." Charlie crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm Charlie. That's Jenna. Come on in." She opened the door all of the way, letting him in.

"Guys, do you remember our driver?" I asked the rest of the band as we walked inside. "Well, he goes by the name Rayge, because of his wicked rages."

"Yeah. About what?" Declan asked.

"Oh...disco music. Right? The Queen, obviously." We all nodded in agreement. "Doing chores in a timely fashion."

"We hate disco too." Ian said, ignoring Rayge's last comment.

"Yeah, hate it." He repeated. "I had to move from New York just to get away from the tight trousers and platform shoes. Do you know how hard it is to walk in platform shoes?" He asked us.

"Right, let's hear a rage then." Gilly said.

"Ah, go on." Ian egged him on.

"Uh, at this hour? I don't like to force them. You know, just let them come naturally. But, it'll happen. What about you guys? You know? What makes you tick?"

"We're The Smell. We're a band. What more is there to say?" Declan asked him.

"Uh, we're a bit more than that, Declan." I corrected him.

"We're a movement." Charlie continued. "We're gonna shock the system. Wake up all the drones."

"Present company included." Declan muttered. Rayge sat down, making a tin full of rice spill all over the floor.

"Oh! Sorry the rice- everywhere. Sorry. You see that Declan?"

We all shared confused looks. "What?" Declan asked.

"The rice- the grains of rice- they're everywhere. Sorry if you feel the urge to have to pick up every single piece."

"Mate, are you trying the leprechaun test on me?" We all laughed at Declan's words, knowing that he was right. "Do you know how hurtful you're being right now? Deeply."

"Declan's a bit touchy about being a ginger." I explained to Rayge. "You're all right Rayge."

"Yeah, well Rayge's gotta leave." Declan insisted. "We've got to plan Operation Mum's Bum."

"Mum's Bum." Rayge repeated. "Mum's Bum? Hey, that sounds fun. I can get into that."

"Well, we could use a driver." I pointed out.

"Can we trust him?" Declan asked me.

"Well, there's only one way to find out." Charlie sided with me.

XXX

"Okay, here we are." Rayge said as we pulled up to St. James Park. "Uh, where are we?"

"St. James's Park next to Buckingham Palace." Charlie told him.

"St. James's Park, you say." Rayge repeated. He's one weird chap.

"The Queen's royal corgis are taking their afternoon constitutional. You're gonna nab one of those little yippers and bring him back to us." Declan explained as we all laughed in agreement.

"We're- we're not going to hurt the dog, are we?"

"No. We're gonna hurt the Queen." Charlie said smugly. "She treats her dogs to beef wellington while poor people are starving. It's time to expose her hypocrisy."

"Okay, yeah, no problem. Dogs love me." He went to get out, but turned back around. "Question- will the dogs be heavily guarded?"

"Well, that's your problem. It's time to see how far you'll go." I told him.

"If you got a rage stormed up, now's the time." Gilly recommended. He turned around to get out again, but he turned back, as his seat belt pulled him back. He undid the seat belt as we all laughed at him, watching as he got out, knowing he was a deadman.

XXX

"Can we just nick his van already?" Gilly asked us. "That's why we're here, innit?"

"Give him a minute!" Both Charlie and I shut her down.

"How long do you think the poor lad's gonna last in the clink?"

We heard whistles blowing and we turned our heads to see Rayge headed back to us with a corgi in his arms. "Blimey." Ian muttered.

"He did it." I said. "He bloody did it!"

"Go on, roll up Declan!" Charlie yelled at Declan who climbed into the front seat just as Rayge got in the back seat of the car. He drove off and we all hooted and hollered, surprised that he actually completed the mission.