For You | Howl x Reader ✔️

8- Howl

I was watching Y/N as she practiced a new spell. She was learning rapidly and I still hadn't asked her the real reason. I was trying to find an opening and get her to tell me, but unfortunately luck wasn't on my side and I was having a hard time with this whole situation. But I knew I had to ask her soon now. Asking her wasn't what was making me reluctant, but the fact that I would also have to share everything with her if I wanted to gain her trust more and get her to tell me, was making me hesitate. I was scared actually, to tell her everything. During the span of the past two weeks, Y/N and I had become friends. I was scared because she was one of the very few friends I had, and those being Calcifer and Markl only, and I didn't want to lose my friendship with her. Normally, I wouldn't have cared if I lost a friend, but there was something else about Y/N and I didn't want to lose her as my friend. Maybe the fact that she was the only person besides her grandfather who actually cared for me, or maybe, it was because she was his granddaughter, or perhaps something else, but I didn't want to lose Y/N. And I wasn't sure how she'd react after me telling her everything. Nonetheless, I had to go through with it. And I was going to.

I was brought back to reality when Y/N called my name. I looked at her. She came close to me. "Howl, are you okay?" she asked me. "Yes, I'm completely fine, why?" I told her, smiling at her concern for me. "I have been calling your name for the past minute," she told me. "Oh, well, it's nothing." She then moved to sit beside me and looked at me. "Howl, you don't look too good. Are you sure you're okay?" she asked me, and put her palm on my forehead. Her touch sent shivers down my spine. No, that couldn't be right. I was really not feeling good. How could I melt that badly under her touch? "You don't seem to have any fever," she concluded, as she detached her hand away from my forehead. I felt a little disappointed as she retracted her hand and put it in her lap. I looked at her small hands, in her lap. "Howl, Howl?" I looked at her. "I don't think you're okay, Howl," she told me. "Howl??? I asked you something. Are you okay?" she asked me for the billionth time. "I-yes, I'm okay. No, actually, I was wondering if you could talk to me." Dammit, get a grip on yourself, Howl! Why was I being nervous around her? "But, I am talking to you, Howl," she said, concerned. "I don't think you're okay, Howl. Did I do something wrong? Did something else happen? Howl?"
She kept ranting on and on like that, assuming I wasn't okay. "Y/N," I spoke her name loudly and cupped both of her cheeks. That got her attention. She immediately stopped ranting and looked at me. Her beautiful eyes portrayed so much innocence in them. I smiled a little when I saw the blush on her cheeks. But my smile was quickly replaced by a sad expression. "What is it, Howl?" she asked me, concern laced in her soft voice. I let go of her face and looked away. "Howl, Howl, Howl, listen to me," she pleaded. I finally took a deep breath and faced her. "Come to my room in an hour. It's time we talk." I got up and started waking inside. She ran after me and put a hand on my shoulder. "But what about?" she asked me concerned. I didn't answer. Her touch was melting me and a sudden desire to hug her rose within me, but getting a grip on myself, I sighed. "Y/N....Just be there in an hour, I'll tell you everything then okay?" She let her hand fall back to her side and she replied with a small okay.

I made my way inside and was about to go up the stairs when Calcifer's voice interrupted me. "Where's Y/N?" he asked me. Calcifer had started caring for Y/N more than he ever did for me. I wanted to smile at this, but my current state of mind didn't let me. Instead, I gave him a painful expression. "Howl, are you okay?" the fire asked me softly. "I just- yeah, I'm fine," I told him and climbed the stairs. I slumped myself on my bed and closed my eyes. What would be her reaction once she finds out? Will she ever forgive me? Or maybe, it won't affect her much and she'll want to stay friends with me. I groaned and pulled at my hair in frustration as I bit my lip in nervousness, and a knot formed inside my stomach.

I heard a soft knock on my door, which fortunately brought me back from my thoughts, but unfortunately this was the moment I had been dreading since i agreed to become Y/N's master. I reluctantly went towards the door and opened it, revealing a concerned looking Y/N. "May I come in?" she asked in a small voice. She looked nervous. I nodded and let her in. I closed the door behind me and gestured for Y/N to sit on the bed. "I know my room is messy and filled with trinkets everywhere, so please don't mind," I told her. I went to the bed as well and sat there a little beside her.