The Stars

Chapter 3

"Please explain to me the reason why you find it necessary to wake me up at 6 am to use my phone to message Phil when you also have him in your contacts?" Ranboo muttered as he tried getting your phone back from you.

You, who was sitting on the floor away from Ranboo getting his phone back, furiously typed on Ranboo's phone.

"Ah. My back. My legs. Oh, I'm not flexible to do a split. Why did I decide this? I think I pulled some sort of muscle. That's it. What are you typing? That's a whole...mighty...paragraph you got there," Ranboo collapsed onto the floor.

"He's in SF. Wait. He's in fucking San Francisco?"

"You made me go through all that just to find out he's in the famous and notorious SF?" Ranboo asked in disbelief.

"No. I also have blackmail info about you now."

"What! What did he tell you."

"That's a very sacrilegious way to hold a Subway footlong y'know. Tubbo told me."

"No," Ranboo pouted stubbornly. "Everyone else is wrong. I'm not in the wrong."

"Ask for a fucking bag then!"

"Urghhh," Ranboo groaned and leaned against his bed. "I'm too tired for this. I asked. They said they didn't have any."

"Make one then. I dunno, use your hoodie as a temporary bag."

"Oh ok," Ranboo sat up aggressievly. "Let's let the world come after me for doing that. Again."

"Better than everyone going 'OH MA GAWD. SHOES. LOOK. PANTS. OOOooOOoO' like they did with Dream."

"It's called curiosity."

"Curiosity killed the motherfucking cat. Just carry it with one hand. It's not a fucking baby."

"It costs money and I'm not leaving it to be depressed on the ground like something Technoblade would think of doing to an orphan. I'd chuck it to space."

"Technoblade's probably tested if Phil is actually immortal," you commented randomly.

"Speaking of immortality, Imma go ask Tubbo for that picture of you soaking wet after you jumped into the pool," you said, standing back up.

"Why does he have a picture of me in drenched clothes?"

"I took it. From the window."

"Stalker."

"It's a small space. I have nowhere else to go except stalk you."

"You could have stayed in the US."

"Damn. Hated me that much?"

Ranboo stuttered, "N-no." He paused for a moment to reconsider. "Maybe."

"I think I also have a picture of you running away from Rocky about 6 or 7 times smaller than you."

"In the defense of my pride, Rocky tried to murder me."

"No offense to Rocky, but Rocky is the laziest cat I have ever seen. You can rarely see Rocky go out on his daily nature hike alright?"

You walked out of Ranboo's bedroom, placing his phone down on his desk.

"Thank you. Now if you excuse me, I'm going back to bed." Ranboo wrapped a blanket around him, jumped onto his bed, and started fake snoring loudly.

"You sound like Peppa Pig's dad in the Peppa Pig introduction where he oinks."

Ranboo choked. "What?" he yelled in disbelief. "You're comparing me to Peppa Pig's dad now? Save that one for Techno or something."

*Time skip*

"AHA! Subway responded to my tweet saying that's how you hold a subway sandwich. I have proof," Ranboo yelled at you through his microphone.

"Jeez. Are you trying to get me deaf or something? One moment you're quiet, another moment you're as loud as those Amazon delivery trucks and their backup beeper when I'm tranna sleep."

i have no life 👍