The Marauders and Lily

Crashing Down

Lily 

I sat at breakfast alone, softly smiling to myself. I had left the boys in my common room, fast asleep after a long night of pranks; the only boy missing was Peter. A hint of concern crossed my expression as I thought of his many absences recently. I had been painfully aware of the Marauders since our first train ride to Hogwarts, they were the loudest and most obnoxious boys I had ever encountered; for seven years I'd been an outsider observing the four boys that were never apart. Never once had Peter been absent. Now, it was rare to see him with them. Before my thoughts could continue, I was surrounded by the Marauders, once again missing Peter. 

"Notice something, Lily?" Sirius said, chuckling as he took a seat beside me. James sat across from me, Remus across from Sirius, as I looked around. I stopped myself from mentioning Peters absence, knowing that the boys surrounding me were trying to ignore that. Then, my eyes landed on the empty Slytherin table. 

The boys around me laughed as they realized where I was looking. I studied each of their faces, waiting for them to reveal what they had done last night. Before any of us could say a word, a pack of Slytherins entered the hall, each with burgundy and gold hair. I burst into laughter, Sirius putting his hand over my mouth and pulling me to his chest to silence me. 

That was the thing about Marauder pranks, they were obviously the Marauders, but it could never be proven. Never would they be caught laughing with the rest of the student body or taking credit when people congratulated them. If you hadn't known them while they were perfecting this technique, you would never know that they were the ones behind these pranks. The only way students younger knew they were to blame was from the rumors surrounding the boys. The rumors surrounding these boys were never-ending. Everyone wanted to know constantly who they were with, what they were doing, and why it didn't include them. 

The mail flew in with a sudden burst of noise. I was awaiting a letter from my parents, so I looked up expectantly. Instead of my mothers usual floral envelope, a cream colored envelope landed before me. I picked it up, while Sirius joked, "In trouble, Evans? Never thought you'd be the first of us to get a letter from the Ministry of Magic."

That caught my attention. The Ministry of Magic? What could I have done to catch their attention? Sure, I was an outstanding student, but that wasn't rare. What could they possibly need from me. My fingers pried open the envelope, taking out the thick parchment inside. I skimmed the words, words causing my stomach to drop. I didn't even let myself read the letter in its entirety, I simply ran, dropping the letter on the table behind me. 

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James

Sirius already had the letter in his hand before Lily had made it a foot away from the table. I knew better then to follow her before knowing if she needed to be alone. If it was good news, I'd give her her space. But, I could feel from the energy at the table that this envelope was about to change everything. Sirius tossed the letter at me, not even looking up from the table to meet my eyes. I looked down, beginning to read the letter, barely making it two sentences in before I was running after Lily. 

I reached in my pocket for the map, coming up empty handed. Peter had it, Peter always had it lately. I rolled my eyes as I continued to run, now yelling for Lily. Everyone I passed chuckled, assuming it was our first 'lovers quarrel'. But, it was much worse than that. So much worse. Lily's parents were dead and nothing would ever change that fact. I continued my hunt for Lily, desperation apparent in my calls. 

"Oi! Mate! Shut up," Sirius yelled from a staircase below me, Remus at his heels. We headed towards each other, meeting in the middle of a staircase. 

"You're really telling me not to find Lily?" I shouted angrily, "because I'm thinking she might like her boyfriend right now."

Sirius' tone was calm, "No, I'm simply suggesting that you stop making Lily's business everyone else's problem."

"Well, if someone would like to retrieve the map from Peter, I wouldn't have to be yelling for her," I spat out. 

"Lily doesn't need to see you like this, she needs someone level-headed right now. Not James pissed off because he won't let himself deal with his shit, " Remus said in his tone that suggested that it would be unwise to argue with him. 

I nodded, releasing him to find Lily himself. Letting myself be dragged by Sirius into my common room, "What's wrong with you? She needs you, you know that. What the hell are you doing?"

I looked up, knowing that every word he had spoken was true. I knew Lily needed me and I wasn't there. Before I could stop, I was saying every thought running through my head, "This war is real and people will die. Hell, they are dying. I know we'll start receiving letters like that a lot. But, if one day it's one of our names on that letter, I don't think I'll ever recover."

"Go find Lily." That's all he said to me, a simple statement. With that, I ran out of the common room, with a head clear enough to know where I'd find Lily. I ran towards the Astronomy tower. 

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Remus

I ran away from James and Sirius towards the Astronomy tower. I knew Lily hadn't been thinking enough to remember that that was Death Eater territory now. When we began attending Hogwarts, it had been a safe space to sit with your thoughts, now it was a war zone for anyone not directly affiliated with you know who himself. 

I crept up the stairs with my wand drawn, ready to find chaos or calm. Ready to protect Lily. What I didn't expect to see was Severus and Lily staring at each other in silence. I watched as they continued to stare at each other, tears pouring down Lily's face. 

"They're dead. They're dead and it's all your fault," She muttered out. The hostility I expected wasn't apparent in her voice. She said it as a fact. 

He looked taken back before replying, "It's a war. Lives are always lost, you can't blame me for that." 

They stood in silence once again, simply staring at each other. I was aware that they were both mourning everything that had been ruined between them. They were mourning the reason there was empty air between them. When James ran up the stairs, wand drawn, I stopped him before they could take notice to his arrival. I knew that us interrupting wouldn't do any good for anyone here.

"He wouldn't have known about my parents if it hadn't been for you. They would be alive still," Once again, there were no anger in her words, it was simply a fact she was stating. He nodded, looking at the ground, "I can't do this anymore." 

"Do what?" He said, his tone pleading. 

"I can't pretend that you are the boy I met so many years ago. I just can't. Everything has changed," She said. The tears were still falling in a steady stream down her face. 

I knew James couldn't wait anymore when he finally entered the room. Severus immediately raised his wand, ready for the fight I assumed was coming. Though, James was calm when he spoke, "Love her enough to walk away right now. Please, just walk away."

With that, Severus nodded and passed me as he walked down the stairs. My eyes followed his decent. When I looked back up, I found James bridal carrying Lily. He nodded at me and I followed them down the stairs. We made our way silently to their common room. No one mentioning that class had long since started.