Secrets

Chp. 4

Sciarra P.O.V

I woke up the next morning at the sound of my alarm. I took in a deep breath, knowing that in an hour I'll have to face Justin again. I walked into my bathroom, cringing as I saw the girl standing in the mirror. My hair was a wreck, my face was red still from my total breakdown yesterday, and my eyes just looked so dull and tired. I was tired. I turned on the shower, wincing as I felt the hot water hit my cold body. I scrubbed away the makeup that was managed to stay on my face. I cleaned my body, and then soon shaved. I flinched back as I accidentally pricked my skin. Too many thoughts ran through my mind, so I quickly turned off the shower.

I stepped out of the shower, sighing to myself. I did my normal routine with my hair. Canada was always confusing when it came to fall. It was either humid and hot out or cold and dry. I blow dried my hair, and sprayed in some leave in conditioner. One thing I hated about my hair was that it was straight but it had its days where it just gets wavy and puffy. I changed into an a size too big leopard shirt that Ryan bought me, black leggings, and black flats. I quickly put on a minimal amount of make up and I was ready to go.

As I started to walk down stairs, I heard laughter coming from the kitchen. Was that Justin? My throat went dry as I heard his angelic laugh. My mom said something to him, sending Justin into another wave of laughter. "Mom?" I asked, my breath got caught in my throat as I felt Justin's eyes meet mine. I looked away, feeling my heart ache. "Hey honey, you seem to be up early. Are you feeling okay?" I gave out a small laugh, nodding my head. "Yeah but I just wanted to get to school earlier." To avoid a certain someone but like always, God is never on my side when it comes to him.

I walked over to the fridge, grabbing an apple. "Sciarra, did you know that Justin is staying here for the rest of the year?" I bit my lip, avoiding eye contact with him. "Yeah I did." I said a bit too harshly but I dont think my mom noticed. The way Justin was looking at me though, I knew that he noticed how cold I was being. I felt my mom look at me with hope in her eyes and I just sighed shaking my head.

My mom always wanted us to get back together, even after everything that happened a year ago. I know that she wanted me to tell him what happened, but I couldn't. It's too late to tell him now. "Wait, why are you even here?" I asked Justin, the question blurting out of my mouth. I quickly shut my mouth, slightly turning away from him. "I couldn't sleep so I just decided to stay here." I gave him a quick nod, paying attention to my half eaten apple.

There was an awkward and filled with tension silence as my mom moved around, trying to make pancakes. No one knew what to say to each other. I didn't know what to say Justin, he was a stranger to me now. I quickly threw out my apple, not being able to take it anymore. "I'm going to go to school now." I told my mom, her giving me a small glimpse of disappointment. "What about breakfast?" My mom asked me. "I'm not that hungry." I was never hungry anymore.

"Wait, Ci-Sciarra, can you give me a ride?" He almost called me Cici. The nickname he started.

"Don't you have your car here?" All this time I wanted to be with him alone, but now I'm terrified. "No, I drove back home last night, and I just decided to walk here." I nodded my head, biting my lip, something that used to drive him crazy. I want to say no to him but I want to be at least somewhat civil with him.

"Yeah, I can drive you." He gave me a small smile, mumbling a quick thank you. I walked ahead of him, an uncomfortable silence surrounding us. I unlocked the doors, quickly getting into my car. I shivered as I pressed my back against the leather seat. "Thank you again by the way." I looked at him, giving him a small smile. As I backed out of the driveway, I noticed Justin turning on the radio. I silently thanked him.

"I'm just going to ask, but what will Hannah say?" I didn't need her bitching at me because I drove her boyfriend to school. Her boyfriend. I hated that more than anything. I felt jealousy erupt in my stomach, and I had to grip onto the wheel tightly. "She'll probably ask why I got to school early or why I didn't pick her up." He seemed almost done with her. He was emotionless when he talked about her. It was cold... almost distant. There was tension between us again, and it was getting hard to breathe.