True Disaster ✔️

Seven

"if your heart has seen better days then i swear to you it will see them again."
---
three years ago

I knock on the door to Grayson's apartment and when he opens the door he steps aside. "Come in." I walk inside while playing with the bracelet around my wrist. "Melody is at school right now and she won't be back until three because she has a tutoring session," Grayson said before closing the door and then we walked towards his room.

I texted Grayson telling him I wanted to come over so that I could talk to him. I got my acceptance letter to Syracuse in the mail about one month ago. I haven't told Grayson yet. I haven't told any of the guys either because it's just not the right time.

Alexis only died a couple of weeks ago and I barely had anything to eat these past few weeks. I just can't stomach anything down right now.

I haven't talked to any of the guys since the funeral and Grayson and I have been kind of distant with each other.

I just needed some time alone to deal with the fact that Alexis died. We haven't known each other for a long time but I feel like out of all of my friends Alexis was there for me in ways no one ever was, other than Grayson. But she was always there for me when she needed to focus on herself, and she was always so selfless.

Once we were inside Grayson's room, Grayson sat down on his bed, and then I was leaning on the wall across from him. "So, I wanted to tell you something," I said hesitantly.

"Okay. What is it?" Grayson asked.

"I got accepted to Syracuse." I leaned off the wall and walked towards Grayson who was sitting on the edge of his bed. Once I was close enough to him, he grabbed my hand and pulled me closer so that I was standing in between his legs. "I'm going to be studying fashion design over there."

"When are you leaving?" Grayson looked up at me.

I like how he knows I will be leaving and that he isn't getting mad or questioning me about moving. Grayson and I never talked about what will happen when I move. We kind of just went with the flow of how things rolled between us.

"Soon," I answered in a soft tone.

"When did you find out you got accepted?"

"Like a month or so ago." I looked at Grayson instead of our hands intertwined. Grayson sighed and he let go of my hands and stood up before walking towards the corner of the room. "I wanted to tell you, but I didn't know how too Grayson," I said before turning around to face him. "Alexis just died and I'm not trying to use her death as an excuse, but I just didn't think it was the time to tell everyone that I got accepted."

"You still could have told me." Grayson turned around to face me. "I knew you were going to leave for college Willow, but I didn't know you were going to leave so quickly," Grayson explained.

"I don't want to. I want to stay here with you and Melody, but I also want to achieve my dream."

"Then stay here and go to school here," Grayson said while sounding a little frustrated.

"It's not as easy as you think, and you know that. I don't want to be here in LA anymore. I can't stay with my parents anymore."

"Move in with me then."

I shake my head lightly. "I'm not moving in with you. Why would I move in with you when we aren't even girlfriend or boyfriend? I'm not trying to guilt-trip you or anything, I'm just stating the facts, Gray."

"We were never boyfriend or girlfriend because we both agreed that this would be a casual thing because of how your parents think of me and because I needed to focus on Melody, not a relationship," Grayson stated.

He isn't wrong and I'm not trying to guilt-trip him, but I am not going to move in with Grayson when we are just casual. He doesn't know how I truly feel about him and how it would hurt too much to keep doing this casual thing.

"Exactly. That's why I can't move in with you Gray. I want to stay here with you and Melody, but I can't. I need to try and start new. I need a break from LA all together but that doesn't mean I don't want to leave you or Melody because I don't."

"How do you think Melody will react when I tell her that Alexis died, and you are leaving? I don't have the heart for that Willow." Grayson argued.

"You can't pin how Melody will react on me. And you knew I would be leaving. I told the entire group during lunch and whenever we all hangout. I said how I wanted to go to school in New York for design."

"I just thought we had more time." Grayson sighed and I see his fist clench. "I can't tell you what to do Willow." Grayson shrugged his shoulders and walked past me towards his closet before turning back around to look at me.

"I'm sorry," I said softly as if I was whispering. "But I can't stay here. I need to leave LA."

"Whatever Willow," Grayson muttered. "Do you have anything else to say or are you done?"

I know he is hurt. He just doesn't want to show he is. That's not who Grayson is, he doesn't like to call for help when he needs it. I find it a little unhealthy how he does that but that's just how he copes.

"No," I muttered before walking towards his bedroom door. I put my hand on the handle before looking back at him. "I'm sorry again Gray. But if you do need anything you have my number."

When Grayson doesn't say anything, I turn the knob and leave his room. When I get downstairs to my car, I hear the sound of crashing and banging from Grayson's apartment.

I force myself to not turn around and go back to him. Instead, I get in my car and turn the engine on before driving away from his building.