"So whenever you ask me again, how I feel, please remember that my answer is you."
Namjoon and Yoongi were once friends that had blossomed into something more, but both producers were too caught up with their own lives to notice the cracks that form...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
***
"Due to the long time we shared, perhaps it's just natural our expectations increased. Even with our countless shouts, we couldn't reach each other's hearts."
Life was good for the two young men, Kim Namjoon and Min Yoongi, who are fresh out of college with high hopes and dreams they want to achieve. The two had met in high school as the student council president and the music club leader, but they got closer when they found out that they both went and watched the same underground rap battles. At first, there was no hint of affection towards them as their friendship did not blossom immediately; instead, Namjoon and Yoongi started off as rivals in the underground.
It was the typical enemies-to-lovers trope in a story.
When Namjoon first saw Yoongi on stage, sputtering words and syllables that should not make sense, but he understood it all very clearly. The messages that Yoongi is trying to send to his opponent and to the audience resounded in Namjoon's heart as if all those harsh words were intended to him. Still, although Yoongi was dissing his opponent, the brash language turned into beautiful flowers as they entered Namjoon's mind. He was in complete awe of the young man that stood in front of him on stage with people cheering and hyping him up. Although he was a rapper himself, he just started coming to these underground battles but made a name for himself for his intelligent use of words. The Yoongi on stage was very different from the Yoongi that was his schoolmate and the leader of the music club.
He first met Yoongi in school in his freshman year of high school. The young man was only a year older than him, but there was nothing that really interested him about Yoongi that made him want to talk to Yoongi or even become friends with him. As far as they both know, they don't have anything in common. The school years went by, and Namjoon would only interact with Yoongi through the hallways in between classes, at lunch when he sat at the table next to his, or when Namjoon became the student council president and Yoongi was the leader of the music club which meant that they have to see each other and talk every week at their student meetings with the other members.
There was nothing that Namjoon could think about Yoongi that would make him dislike Yoongi or like him enough to become his friend. But it all came crashing down when he got a boner like a kid looking at magazines when he saw Yoongi on stage raging and sweating as his deep voice echoed in Namjoon's ears. Every word engraved itself on the back of his mind.
Seeing a familiar face from school watch him spit bars and curse like a maniac on stage in front of a crowd was not part of Yoongi's plan to spend the night. It was a school night, and yet he was not in the mood to go home and have another argument with his father. Instead, he decided to visit and join a rap battle just like he always does, but this night is different; he only visits on weekends to avoid getting distracted from his schoolwork, but he just needed to let out a little steam, and he was unfortunate to have come at the same night that his school's student council president was standing among the crowd. The young man was only a year younger than him, but Yoongi saw the look that Namjoon was giving him. It was as if a child saw their favorite cartoon on the television. Yoongi saw Namjoon was in awe as he continued to stare at him.
When he first met Namjoon, it was the first day of school, and the young man was just a freshman. He did not have any particular interest in Namjoon other than the whispers that he heard from the teachers and students about how smart he was. At some point, Yoongi thought of him as a nerd. As years went by, Yoongi found himself having a schoolmate relationship with Namjoon because of their positions in the student council and club leaders. They both carry respect for each other's diligent work in school, and the polite exchange of looks and words was enough for them. Now, Yoongi sees him standing amongst the crowd with wide eyes sparkling as he stares at Yoongi, listening to his every word.
It was like love at first sight but not quite.
Having the same hobbies and interests as a rapper, writing lyrics, and making beats, Namjoon and Yoongi's relationship evolved into a healthy rivalry. Friends is still not a stage they are at, but they had a silent agreement to become each other's rivals in the underground scene but never mentioned it in front of each other when they are at school.
This interaction went on for months until their rivalry finally blossomed into a friendship. Their fellow schoolmates were surprised to see two strangers acting so friendly towards each other. Nobody in school has ever seen Yoongi or Namjoon interact with each other in such a manner other than student council meetings or passing by each other in the hallways. But since then, Yoongi and Namjoon have become inseparable. Even when they went to college and met new friends of their own, they still stuck with each other, visiting the underground scene from time to time when they were free from the shackles of their school work or jobs. They even became roommates at some point in their college days which showed them a glimpse of what their life could be if they lived together under one roof.
Yoongi and Namjoon were happy. They were content with the life that they had with each other. As their friendship deepened, love bloomed from the seeds they planted in each other's hearts, and they began to reap what they sowed. Halfway through college, after one drunken confession from Namjoon, the two of them made their relationship official, and they lived in cloud nine for the next following years as they finished their college days together. It was all perfect. Because Yoongi is a year older, he finished college early and began to look for a job that could help support him and Namjoon's rent, taking care of Namjoon like he always does. As soon as Namjoon graduated, they left the dorm and moved in together, working through the way of life side by side. They were happy.
But like they all say, happiness always comes to an end.
As they grew older, it became difficult to have time for each other because of the stress and how busy they were with work. They both wanted to become producers, to create songs for other people to sing and present in front of a crowd. It had been their dream for a very long time. But as years passed by, Namjoon realized that if he could not get a single slot from a single company, then that would mean he was not just cut out to be what he wanted to be. Instead, he decided to become a businessman and work in a company to support himself and Yoongi, but because of this, he doesn't have any time set for his boyfriend.
Like Namjoon, Yoongi wanted to be a producer as well, and he is committed to achieving his dreams. He was shocked to find out that Namjoon had given up on their dream and became a businessman instead, but he could not force Namjoon into doing something he didn't want to do. Still, he continued to apply in different entertainment companies, looking for a slot and still making music by posting them online. Because his boyfriend is always at work, he is always busy making music and visiting many different entertainment companies. Yoongi doesn't have any time set for his lover.
They were exhausted, both from their work and their relationship. They didn't even try to hide it anymore and just figured that the other wouldn't care about what was going to happen to the relationship they worked so hard to build. But the tide is changing, and the wind is blowing into another course, and before they knew it, everything had shattered and broken.
Namjoon and Yoongi broke up.
Agreeing that this was the best course of action, they both went their separate ways and promised to never see each other again after the painful breakup. They both drowned themselves in work, and for the next couple of months, they will mourn for the death of their love and give up on another chance that they may find other people and love again.
Years went by, and Namjoon found his love for music again. He quit his job and landed a spot in an entertainment company, and became their biggest producer. Yoongi as well finally landed a job with the help of his longtime friend from college, Kim Seokjin, whose father owns an entertainment company. Life eventually became better for the both of them, and from time to time, as they write the words for the new song that they are going to make, they cannot help but think about each other and remember how they felt about each other's names heavy on their lips.
