Immature Mistakes | mj.q✓

One

TRIGGER WARNING: There are definitely mentions of suicide in this book

Jiaqi could hardly hear anything, but he could somehow feel himself in motion. He didn't know where he was, he could hardly see, but there were bright lights everywhere, he was sure of that.

He could hear crying and screaming, then he could also hear commands.

'My baby!' a woman's voice made its way to his ears, he could tell she was crying.

'He's only 18, we can't let this happen.' a male voice said to someone, and that was the only thing he heard clearly. The rest sounded like strange murmured.

He could feel himself being lifted up and put somewhere, then there was a total silence and darkness.

'Revive him! Come on!' the same male voice pierced the silence. 'We're losing him! He's going into cardiac arrest!'

'Clear!' another voice shouted. Suddenly, Jiaqi felt his body lurch forward.

'No, no, no, this is bad.' the first male voice said. 'Again.'

'Clear!' the voice shouted once more, and once again Jiaqi's body lurched forward.

'Again.'

'Clear!'

Jiaqi didn't know what was going on exactly, but he had an idea. He knew that the end was near. He didn't want to die. Even though he had done this to himself a couple of hours ago, the realization that death was so near made him realize that he didn't want to die.

'We've lost him,' the male's voice seemed to grow more distant and there was a loud beeping sound.

There was silence, utter silence. Was he dead?

Jiaqi prayed to whoever or whatever was out there to save him. He never thought he would be praying that when he had wanted his life to end some hours earlier. When he was purposely overdosing the pills he had stolen from the hospital, he never thought he would be in this position.

But it was too late.

Please, I don't want to die, I'm gonna change, he continued to plead to whoever was listening to his thoughts. Please.

Silence...

and darkness...

'What!?' one female voice shouted. 'Doctor, look.'

The beeps returned, but this time they were slow and consistent.

'This is a miracle...' the doctor commented in awe. 'Let's get back to it! Quickly before we lose him again!'

Once again, his body lurched forward when the electric shock from the defibrillator paddles reached him.

'He's alive...' someone commented.

Was he really alive?

...

Jiaqi was met by bright lights. He knew his eyes were opened, but his vision was quite blurry.

'Jiaqi,' his mother's familiar voice cried. He saw her head appear above him, complete with her black hair almost falling on his body. Although a blurry image, he could tell that it was her.

He wanted to respond, but he couldn't say anything. It was like the words couldn't come out of his mind even though he formulated them.

'He needs some rest and some time to recover.' a nurse told Mrs. Ma.

'Oh,' she sniffled. 'I see. But is he okay? Is he fine?'

'He is,' she assured him.

Jiaqi saw the blurry figures walk away from his sight, and his eyes closed once again. He felt weak and sapless, not being able to even turn to the side.