The Perks of Being a Side Effect

Chapter 7

My condition had been notably getting worse. Frequent visits to the hospital had both my family and I exhausted and stressed. It was beginning to reach the point where I wondered if I would be sparing my parents the trouble and the money if I simply died. A grim thought albeit, but in a state such as this it was all I could dwell on.

Not even Charlie's letters were doing me justice. To be frank, I barely read them. I half heartedly skimmed through them and cast them aside, a small pile of papers and torn envelopes was developing on the floor next to my bed. Not only had the cancer been taking its toll on me, but my growing need for Augustus also gnawed my insides. Of course I knew I would not be seeing him.

Isaac visited me each day, having claimed a spot on the corner of my bed, he would sit in silence while I was hooked up to various machines to keep me breathing. Somehow, the blind guy became aware of the growing pile of letters on the floor and expressed his concern.

"I'm not exactly in a state where I can organize then neatly, Isaac." I would respond bitterly, however this was a lie. It would be little trouble to maintain a semi-clean pile of the letters on the small table beside me or someplace else. I just didn't have the heart to maintain anything anymore. Somewhere deep inside I knew I was nearing my end and unlike Augustus it was not unexpected or quick. It was slow and consumed me bit by bit each day. At this point, I'm not sure which is worse.

Gus was promised a long life, however it was cruelly revoked but it was still quick. In my case it was quite the opposite. We knew the cancer was terminal, it was just a matter of when. I had no chance at life whereas Augustus did. He should have lived the life he was promised.

With each passing day I grew weaker, my thoughts grew darker and my heart cried for Gus. How long had it been since I visited his grave? Would I die before ever visiting it again?

As thoughts such as these hassled me, Isaac was sitting cross legged on my floor, his fingers skimming the pages of Charlie's letters which I had thrown aside. "I'd read them to you, but you know." He said, tapping the corner of his dark tinted sunglasses.

"It must suck to not be able to read." I say.

"Well reading was never really my thing but I mean they have audiobooks so I'll survive." He responded and continued to touch the fine paper.
When Isaac first began coming to see me daily, my parents had asked if he was my new love interest. At first, I was insulted in a way. As if Gus' death was something so easily overcome and he was so easy to replace. I realized though, that in their eyes maybe Isaac was a love interest. But he wasn't, which is something they wouldn't understand.
Because they would not understand how the best company for someone dying of cancer, is another person cursed with it as well.

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A/N

A small chapter for this little short story of mine. Once again, I apologize for slow updates on ALL my stories, I'm trying to work through that.

Anyways, thanks for reading.

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~ Red xx