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———— HIS FEET NEVER MOVED FASTER.
he bolted out of the locker room, dashing past the rest of the team as he made his way to the station. natsusa and ibuki watched as he ran off, unsure of whether to tell him to stop or to keep going. by the time they made a decision, he was too far gone. this was up to him now.
yasunari boarded the bus, his leg shaking a bit as it made its way towards his destination. nothing could prepare him for this confrontation, but it was now or never. if he couldn't look her in the eye and tell her what he felt, then what was the point in even trying?
he got off the bus and walked the familiar route, keeping his eyes trained on the ground ahead of him. the cracks in the sidewalk, the little patches of grass. everything was so familiar and yet so foreign. it was almost like he was going back in time. his steps began to slow once he started getting closer, that anxious feeling returning as he placed a hand on his stomach. it felt hollow, almost. that sinking feeling ran through his chest into his legs, and eventually, everything came crashing when he faced the door.
do i knock?
he stared at the door, arm slowly raising up to try and make a decision. in an instant, his heart made the decision before his head did, and he found his knuckles tapping against the door at an awkward pace. once realizing he actually did that, he began to panic, wiping the sweat off his brow as he began to turn around to leave. but, the door opened.
"... yasunari?"
he turned his head to meet the eyes of the girl, seeing her sunken eyes widen at the realization that he was actually standing there. "hey, [y/n]."
"i- uh-"
"i got your voicemail."
"i got yours, too."
"i'm sorry," the both blurted out, now unaware of who was to continue the conversation first. [y/n] crossed her arms over her chest, shying into the house a bit, so yasunari took it as him speaking first.
"everything you said was valid. those feelings you felt were valid. you meant a lot to me, but i just couldn't bring myself to fully accept that someone like you could like someone like me. it was a crazy concept, and i didn't know how to deal with that. i know now that i was an idiot, and i'm sorry. you didn't deserve all the uncertainty i caused." she nodded slowly as she pursed her lips.
"i'm sorry for making you feel like you weren't enough, because you were. i just wanted you to figure that out on your own, but didn't give you the clues or the push you needed."
"i guess we both suck at this, huh?" yasunari dryly chuckled, [y/n] cracking a small smile.
"yeah, i guess."
the two were unsure of what to say now. everything was out in the open, so what more was there to do? what more could they have possibly said to the other to magically fix everything?
yasunari tapped his finger against his elbow, trying to work up the courage to find something to say. [y/n] slowly began retreating back into the house, and, in a split second decision, yasunari stepped inside, grabbing her by the wrist.
he looked down at his hand before looking up at [y/n], who was glancing at his hand as well. he took a breath and shook his head. "fuck it," he muttered, pulling her towards him and gently grabbing her face, bringing his lips to hers.
he kissed her not to save the relationship, or to fix whatever they were trying to fix, but he kissed her because this would probably be the last time. he knew he hurt her. he knew she probably wouldn't forgive him. but, he wanted to do this one last thing before they left each other's lives.
he felt her tears on his face as he pulled away, seeing her eyes were still closed as her head moved to look down at the ground. a tear fell from her cheek onto his hand, and he felt his body grow hot. he didn't mean for any of this to happen. "i'm sorry," he whispered, slowly letting go of her hand and heading out to leave. he had caused enough damage.
"no, wait," she shakily called out, and he turned, seeing her looking at him with her sunken, tear-stained face. "stay. please. even if it's just for a minute. i just... don't want you to go."
"are you sure?" he asked, and she shook her head, letting out an almost cynical, dry laugh.
"fucking hell, tsuru. i want you here forever. you said you wanted to be the one to make me smile, and look at me now! crying because you're trying to walk out of my life without even attempting to see if i wanted that. you're a selfish bastard, you know that? you're a careless, crude, selfish bastard and i hate that i called you back. i hate that i fell in love with you and i can't even get you to stay. so, fuck me for wanting to think this was going to be some goddamn fairytale. fuck everything!" she yelled, only to be stopped by yasunari shoving her back inside and closing the door. she stumbled a bit, catching herself as she grabbed onto the railing of the stairs, seeing his demeanor change.
"i'm so in love with you, it fucking hurts," he muttered, pulling her in for another kiss.
she felt herself completely melt into his touch, breaking down as she held onto him, wanting to never let go. they broke away and he held her head close to his chest, rubbing her back as she cried into his shirt, her body shaking as he held onto her even tighter.
