Punch Drunk Love (Jongkey/2MIN)

Shoot Anonymous

A/N: f came up with this omfg ok this is gonna be great (or just not). we've had some weird ass chapters recently -v

A/N 2: This doesn't really count as a real chapter. I thought of this when I was bored so I just thought it would be funny to write it! We will continue from the last chapter in the following! -f

--

The five members of SHINee decided to meet up to go shopping on their final day in London. It was midday as they entered a fancy clothes shop on Key's behalf (who had been complaining about how he hadn't done much clothes shopping since they arrived as Jonghyun had dragged him to boring museums).

Onew, Minho and Jonghyun sat on the chairs in the centre of the shop - bored out of their minds as Key and Taemin wandered around the shop, picking up random items of clothing and folding them over their arms to try on in the changing rooms. They were giggling like children, admiring what the other person had found and then discussing styling tips. Minho found it hard to believe how much his Taemin knew on the subject of fashion.

"Are you guys done yet?" Onew asked, pulling out his phone as if he were about to text someone, but he frowned to himself and put the phone away again, earning him some odd looks from Jonghyun and Minho who were focusing on him as there was nothing else to look at.

"We haven't even began to try them on yet!" Taemin said as he flicked through the dress shirts near the back of the shop.

"Hurry up," Jonghyun whined. "I'm hungry."

"Shut up, Jjong - you're the one that agreed to come shopping with me in the first place. I had to put up with all your lame ass museums!" Key sassed, grinning before disappearing into the changing rooms. Taemin followed close behind, blowing Minho a kiss making the rest of SHINee pull faces.

"You guys are still together?" Onew asked. "I thought that you would have drifted since..." He trailed off when he saw Minho's death glare.

But Jonghyun backed him up: "Yeah, that's the sort of thing that ruins relationships."

"Yeah, well, we're over it." Minho turned his head away, trying to shake off his friends' weird looks.

All of a sudden, a scream sounded from the doorway of the shop. The shopkeeper cowered behind the till, shaking.

Onew was the first to his feet, running over to the doorway where he found twelve men in suits, waving guns around.

Taemin and Key appeared from the changing rooms with unbought t-shirts slung over their shoulders. "What's going on?" Minho whispered, hiding behind Taemin with an unsure look on his face. Jonghyun glanced over at the 'Flaming Charisma' and laughed, despite the situation.

The shop grew silent, save the shallow breaths from the shopkeeper who seemed unable to move from her crouching position.

It seemed like an age before anyone said anything; the room was thick with tension.

And they didn't necessarily say anything, but instead, they chanted.

"CARELESS, CARELESS

SHOOT ANONYMOUS, ANONYMOUS!"

Taemin let out a whimper as all twelve of the men in suits pointed their guns straight at the five members of SHINee.

"Wha-" Jonghyun started, a look of realisation on his face as he recognised the boys before him.

"HEARTLESS," one shouted, unexpectedly dropping his gun to the floor in a sob and falling to his knees.

"MINDLESS." One more staggered foward and wrapped his arms around Taemin, weeping onto his shoulder.

"Kai?" Taemin whispered, unsure of how to react, but wrapped his arms around him nonetheless.

"NO ONE WHO CARES ABOUT ME!" All twelve of them finished off their chanting; all twelve of them crying hysterically.

"Nyah!" Key pushed Onew out of the way, running up to pull as many members of EXO as he could into a hug, comforting them.

"What the hell?" Key mouthed to his band mates as Baekhyun and Chanyeol sobbed into his shoulder.

"I have no idea," Jonghyun mouthed back in shock as he tried to comfort the quivering Lay that sat sobbing beside him.

"We're so lonely!" Kris suddenly wailed, sobbing further into Onew's chest, his arm still wrapped around Tao.

"We're going to die alone! We have no normal friends!" Chen shrieked in realisation and he crumpled to the floor once more.

"Guys?" Taemin whispered, arms still around Kai.

They all ignored him, sobbing harder and harder with every second that passed.

"Guys, what the hell?" Taemin suddenly shouted, bringing the twelve boys out of their daze.

"We're so, so lonely Taemin! We have no normal friends, no normal lives, what do we do?" Xiumin cried helplessly, flinging himself around Taemin and he shoved Jongin mercilessly to the floor.

"You have each other, don't you?" Minho pointed out and the boys miraculously stopped crying.

"Huh, I guess you're right." Kyungsoo said, wiping his tears.

"Let's go guys, I'm hungry. Thanks SHINee!" Chanyeol said, standing up.

"Yeah, bye!" The rest said in unison and they walked out of the door without their guns, as if nothing had happened.

"What the fuck?" Key inquired, breaking the silence.

"I don't even want to know," Onew breathed and they all stood up, continuing their shopping awkwardly, still confused as to what just happened.

"Oh, Taemin!" Jongin said as he ran back into the shop. "That top is really sexy, it really brings out your eyes!" he commented, winked and ran back out of the store.

"Well then, I'm definitely getting this shirt," Taemin mumbled, grinning to himself and Minho glared at him.

"Oops," Taemin laughed, knowing that he was going to get a telling off later that night.