Sarah PAULSON'S one shots

au reflet d'or et d'argent

Mildred x reader
Smut
A little short/

This this evening Mildred hadn't heard you fumble with the lock she didn't even hear the foot stops through the entrance of your home. The one that you now shared with Mildred since January. This morning she hadn't had a chance to kiss you goodbye because she worked very early and you were still sleeping when she left.
"Hey Millie I'm home "
Mildred was lost in thought, she had put some type of medical glue in her hair today at work, it was a innocent mistake but nevertheless she had to cut her hair short. Mildred had never changed haircut like this, as a kid her foster parents didn't pay much attention to her hair. So she had to do it by herself but anytime she would change or try something new she would get beaten up. As an adult she never really went to the hairdresser to get her hair done she always worked that hairdo, pined up  or  hair down but still on top of her head some type of curl pattern.
So when she was in front of the mirror today trying to get the glue out and noticed it wasn't going to work she panicked. Tried cutting strands of hair without too much damage. But she ended up with a side shorter than the other and a big hole in it and was forced to cut it. She had now a short cut. Even if Hank told her that she looked great like this that it was nice and lightened her figure, Mildred couldn't help but fear the resentment that came from unexpectedly changing haircut.
So when she came home she did her best to try and pin it but it wouldn't work and she couldn't hide her haircut. Which ultimately meant one thing : you were going to be aware of it.
And you'd probably be mad at her for having cut her long and flowy hair, the one you always complimented, because you said she had the most beautiful curls you'd ever seen. Maybe you wouldn't even want to be with her anymore maybe you wouldn't even want to touch her or love her this way If she had changed something so characteristic about herself. And then she reminded herself of her past, of how the people who were supposed to love her as a kid hurt her really bad for doing such a thing, she wouldn't even think about changing her hair or do try new things, and if she did she was going to be starved or worse.

She was lost in thoughts cutting vegetables to prepare both of your dinners since you had an evening shift and her a morning one, that she didn't even hear you coming through the door and so when you came up behind her and place to kiss on her exposed neck she flinched. She hadn't flinch like this in a very long time. In the beginning of your relationship she would sometimes straddle when you unexpectedly showed her affection and you always reassured that you wouldn't do it if it was too scary or to unusual for her, but that it made you feel closer to her when you knew your able to just pay affection without having to ask for it. And slowly she had a customized to the gentle care that you showed her. No longer  getting surprised by soft curses or slight touches and you were very thankful for that. So it sort of weird that she would now, you tried reassuring her "Oh love it's just me"
She turned around and started backing away a little knife still in her hands. "Baby can you Put that down please"
She did after a short pause, "you are home early !" She said in hurry "Oh my God I'm sorry"

"What about ?" She kept getting a little further away from you, and you held up your hands to show her she was okay.
"Please don't leave, please don't hurt me".

-"You know I would never do that to you sweetheart, Talk to me, where are you now what's going on ?"
Mildred was starting to shake, her hands were trembling, she tried hiding her hair in her hands so you wouldn't see what she had done to herself. Still she waited and the lash out didn't come, you were still standing and very much showing her love. "Did you get a new haircut ?" That phrase send her into a panic state again "I'm so sorry y/n I didn't mean to ! Please don't be mad at me it's just ..I... I got glue in my hair and and it wouldn't leave and...I had to cut it"
"Mildred why would I be mad ?"

Mildred didn't understand, she didn't comprehend how you could look so confused about that, which confused her too. "I didn't ask you I'm sorry, I should have asked you, you should have been the one to tell me how to cut it"
"Why ? We can't get married but I would  certainly not be one of these husbands who would do that to their wives. Besides darling your body is yours you're allowed to change your hair"
"You're just saying this now you're still going to be mad and hurt me"