You followed Namjoon as he ledthe way to an empty supply closet.Your heart was thumping too fast. You didn't know why you were both here, but you had an idea. You're not betting on it though because it's next to impossible.
He closed the door as soon as you both were in the room. You gave him a confused look and he smiled at you sheepishly, though the dangerous glint in his eyes was still there.
"Why are we here?" you asked while looking around the cramped space.
"Y/N," he said slowly, and you felt your heartbeat spiked up even more with the way he let your name roll in his tongue. His voice was suddenly deeper than usual, and for the first time since idolizing Namjoon, you felt a little scared of him.
"W - why?" you asked, stuttering. You cleared your throat, trying to clear it of the tremor that hinted your fear.
But even though you're starting to feel scared, you couldn't deny that you're also... excited... on what's to come.
"Y/N, when are you going back to your country?" His stare was so intense that you began to squirm under it. Gone was the nice and easy-go-lucky friend you had a while ago. Right now, this guy is as serious as it can get.
"Tomorrow night. Why?" You cocked your head to the side, seriously confused at what's going on.
Namjoon groaned at your response and he closed his eyes, rubbing his forehead with his fingers.
"Hey, are you okay?" you asked. Your fear was gone, replaced by worry. You reached for him instinctively, touching his hand.
"Y/N." He stopped rubbing his forehead and let his hand dropped. He stared at you with those intense eyes. "I'm about to ask you something that might or might not scare you..."
Those words made your heart stop beating and when it decided to beat again, it was harder than before.
"What is it?" Your voice came out small as you asked the question and Namjoon looked like he was hesitating on saying it.
"I... uhm, would it be okay if... you know, here..." He took his eyes off you, almost sheepishly, and he scanned the room with it before clearing his throat. "Can I-"
He couldn't finish his request but it was pretty obvious what he wanted. You didn't know what made you do the next thing you did. It was so unlike you. But as he struggled to get the words out whileyour heart thumping faster than ever, your skin getting hotter, your breaths deeper, you took a step towards him and placed your hand on his cheeks. It made him look at you, his eyes a little shocked.
You smiled tentatively at him.
"You want sex, right?" It surprised you how you calmly stated it.Namjoon might even think that you're so used to having a one-night stand because of it.
His cheeks turning ten shades of red, he slowly nodded, and oh God, didn't it warm your trembling little heart. One second he got this tough look in him, and then he was acting all shy in front of you the next.
"Look, don't misunderstand. I don't really do this. I mean, this is my first time asking someone this.But... I don't know how to explain... Ijust feel like, I can't let you go that fast without even having this small memory of you. To be honest, I'm attracted to you, and it's probably obvious given what I'm asking. But it's okay if you won't agree." His eyes pleaded you to believe him. Maybe he was just concerned you might start talking about this event to other people and of course, he couldn't have that. It would ruin his career. But, it might also be because he really wanted you to not see him in a dark light.
You just stared at him for a minute, contemplating on things.
It would be crazy if you agree to this. First, you're a virgin, for Pete's sake! Why would you lose your virginity for a one-night stand, even if the one you're doing it with was the man of your dreams? And second, why would you have sex with someone you just knew? That's so against your morals. You're an upright person and this was against your own set of rules.
But, on the other hand, why wouldn't you? This guy was the one you'd always dreamt of. From your brief talk with him, you could feel he's a nice guy. Sure, he's suddenly asking you for sex, but if he wasn't at all good, he would be just pouncing on you like a madman.But, no. He's asking for your permission. Which was what made your morals sway.
And, this might also be the last time you could see him. You never know what might happen in the future.You didn't know if you could save as much money again to fly to Korea. Or if you somehow could, it might not be enough to gain another backstage pass. And as he said, you would also very much love to have a memory of him, given how infatuated you were with him.
You were so confused. You wanted this but at the same time, you don't.
You let out a sigh, which probably worried Namjoon more. He suddenly put his hand on your shoulder, while the other went under your chin to make you look at him.
Gone was the hungry glint in his eyes. Concern was now taking all of his face, and he genuinely looked like his worried about you.
"Y/N, you don't have to say 'yes'. No pressure. I'm not sure what came into me. I'm not really like this. I'm sorry. This might have traumatized you. I'm sorry. Let's go back now. I'm really so-" You cut him off by putting a finger on his lips. That genuine concern he had for you was what made you choose your decision.
Stepping closer to him, you put your hands at the nape of his neck as you stood on your tiptoes, pulling him closer to you. You let your lips met his in a brief moment, just barely brushing, giving him a hint of a kiss.
You looked at him and met his uncertain eyes with your decided one.
"Are you sure?" he asked in a whisper.
"Yes. Just as you said, I'd like to have something of you in my memory, too." You smiled up at him, and you saw how his uncertainty slowly turned to hunger.
Dropping his head lower again, he kissed you hesitantly, waiting for you to respond.
