Love Always: A Novel Inspired by The Perks of Being a Wallflower

Part 3

January 22, 2013

So at this point I can’t tell if we made up with Danielle or not. Some of us accepted her apologies and some of us haven’t. I hope that at some point everything just gets clearer and we can all decide on our own. Thats hard though because a lot of times we all try to agree on everything. I’m ok with befriending Danielle again as long as she doesn’t repeat what she did before. She said she was sorry and she would try harder to be a good friend and I think we should at least give her a chance. We might not see her the same way as we used to but at least she will have a place here. I’m also not ok with befriending her again though because I can’t really be sure that the past won’t repeat. Charlotte says that this has happened to her before and it doesn’t get any better. If it goes the same ways then I will be heartbroken because I decided to trust her again. I guess I’ll just stand back and see how it all pans out. Maybe I’ll fall into the shadows and wait until everything is resolved then magically reappear! I wish I could do that but I am such a big part in the argument now that I don’t think I can. I’m amazed that everyone is doing so well, especially Danielle. I don’t think I could handle being the absolute focus of this, I can barely handle my part right now! 

My weekend was fun, well most of it was anyways. I never ended up going to track practice. I went to Charlotte’s house and we watched movies and ate pizza and talked. It was kind of awkward because none of us were really comfortable with each other at the time. We went with it though and everything ran smoothly. Well, Danielle was upset because Jordyn finally fought back against her over text but everyone else had a good time. On Saturday I saw a play with my family and went to my sister’s best friend’s birthday party. It was at Fun Gym. Some skateboarders showed up closer to the end. They were around my age and they kept staring at me. I saw one point and then threw them an unimpressed look. Then, I second thought myself and threw a flirty look, I REALLY wanted to see what they would do. Last time I did that a pizza guy nearly crashed his car! So, they all got on one trampoline and started doing tricks. They were directly in front of me which just made it easier to manipulate them. One almost broke his neck and another was told not to get on the trampoline again. I laughed so hard when they all slammed into each other and the third guy started crying. Lesson to guys, don’t try to impress girls with synchronized tumbling. It will end in tears and maybe a little blood. I left soon after that and I was happy that I did. I didn’t want to give them the chance to talk to me. 

On Sunday Charlotte came over to help make props for my sister’s play. We had to make a cake for the Mad Hatter’s table. Throughout the year I have made all kinds of things for that stupid table. I’ve made pastries, tablecloths, you name it. My family had to make EVERYTHING as well as practice lines and find a costume for Alice, AKA my sister. Now, we had to make a gravity defying cake. It looks ok so far but I think we could’ve done better if Charlotte and I hadn’t gotten into a paper mache fight. Monday was just weird. Thats all I can say about it.

Love Always,

Quinn

January 23, 2013

I’m in advisee as I’m starting this. I’m going to say that the boys in my class are EXTREMELY awkward. I don’t mean awkward as in my kind of awkward either. I mean awkward as in they sit in class comparing each others chests. Why? I don’t think we will ever know so I just sit and ignore them. I wish that they would at least TRY to make sense. 

So you know how I was supposed to go to track yesterday? I didn’t. I felt sick so I ran on campus until my mother came to get me. I almost ran into Jordyn on my way out of the bush. He didn’t understand why I was running when I felt sick. I couldn’t go to track because if I had to stop I couldn’t but I COULD run on my own will. Running makes me feel better. It clears my mind and I always feel stronger when I’m running. When I run downhill I feel like I’m flying. On and uphill I feel triumphant. Its amazing how doing something you love can make you feel better about life. I used to feel that in art as well. Yesterday in art elective Jordyn went upstairs to finish a math test. Carmen then blasted her pop and rap music and started dancing. I understand that that is normal but she kept staring at me. I threw on my headphones and listened to my music. I recently bought some new albums so I was content. I listened to my new Augustana and Killers albums for all of art elective and tried to ignore Carmen’s vicious stares. I’m waiting for the world to get to her so she understands that she can’t have everything she wants. I want to run through bushes without getting hurt but I can’t have that. No matter how many times I try I will always go home with some scratches. The ones I acquired yesterday are on my face and hands. One scratch is on my left cheek and the other two are on my left hand. My left side was to the bushes when I ran, my right was to the brick wall. I should stop doing that.