Behind the Barriers

22

22

Tahimik lamang ako sa biyahe. Hindi ako mapalagay lalo na at katabi ko lang naman si CJ.

Hindi kami nag-usap nang masinsinan simula nang mag-away kami. Palagi naman niya akong tinetext pero hindi ako nagrereply.

Maybe I was shy. Maybe I was letting my pride get into my head.

Bago sa akin ito kaya naman medyo awkward. Nakakapanibago. Baka ayaw niya na sa 'kin. Maybe I was too immature for him.

"Hihinto ako sa gasoline station," aniya. "Baka may gusto kang bilhin."

I just shrugged and gave him a cold shoulder.

Napansin niya iyon pero hindi niya ito pinuna. Wala na lang din siyang sinabi.

Huminto kami sa gasolinahan. He went out of the car after and went to the convenience store. Ako naman ay naiwan lamang nakahalukipkip.

I saw CJ went outside of the store with a paper bag in him. I admit, he looked majestic with his black polo shirt and jeans. Pumuputok iyong biceps niya.

Napansin ko kung paano siya binalingan ng mga gasoline boy. Pati iyong ibang nagpapagasulina. Girls. Boys. Children.

Yep, he's a head turner.

Kahit masungit ang pormahan niya ay hindi mo pa rin maiwasan na bigyan siya ng pansin.

I looked away when he went inside the car. Shame and guilt slowly crept inside me...

Gusto ko na magkaayos na kami kasi namimiss ko na rin siya. Pero nahihiya akong mag-reach out. So I let it be.

"Bumili ako ng pagkain," aniya. "Nasa backseat. Kumuha ka lang, okay?"

Halos bumaliktad ang tiyan ko sa malambing niyang boses. But I remained firm and only nodded.

Mahina siyang nagbuntong-hininga at nagsimula nang magmaneho.

Throughout the ride, we were just silent. He played a song at iyon lamang ang nag-iingay. Because I am really shy to talk to him, I slept.

Nagising na lamang ako nang may mahinang yumugyog sa balikat ko. Dahan-dahan kong iminulat ang mga mata at nakita si CJ.

"Hey, we're here," he softly said.

Umayos na ako ng tayo at napansin na nasa mountain resort na kami. I yawned and stretched, especially when I felt my neck aching.

Hindi ko talaga siya pinansin kahit nung makalabas na kami. CJ booked the room next to mine. It's not like I'm mad about it but I felt annoyed! Naiinis na ako sa sarili kong pag-iinarte.

It's simple to knock on his door and say sorry. Ganoon lang naman kadali iyon. Pero hindi ko man lang siya matingnan sa mata!

My phone beeped and revealed a text from him.

CJ:

Text mo 'ko kung pupunta ka na sa site. I'll go with you.

Mas tuluyan pa akong nainis at padabog na iligay ang cellphone sa kama. Ugh! He can just tell me that! He can just strike a conversation! May patext-text pa talaga!

My room had a view of the city. Nasa isang mountain top kami kaya sobrang ganda tingnan ng buong lungsod. The pool was also calling me, too. I badly want to relax but I know I can't do that. Not with this feud with CJ.

Imbis na magpahinga ay inilabas ko ang laptop upang magtrabaho. I did not even realize that it's already 4 PM kung wala lang sanang kumatok sa pinto ko.

I opened it and saw CJ. Kaagad pa akong natigilan. Nakalimutan ko na magkasama nga pala kami.

"Let's have dinner," aniya.