Life and Death

Chapter 12

TW: This chapter does contain blood, self-harm, and suicide

I look up to the stars. The little balls of fire look stunning in the darkness and the wind in my hair feels nice. Wait, when did I get outside again? It doesn't matter.

The moon is huge and makes everything in its path glow silver. I look at my surrounding. I am on top of a building, a tall one. The skyline is shimmering with lights. I look at my hands which have a silver hue to them. I hear a dripping sound and look down. There is a splatter of dark liquid. I look to where it is coming from. There is thick, red blood running down my arms. Fresh cuts from a sharp object are evident. Something about this situation seems oddly familiar.

My feet begin to move by themselves, the rough concrete makes my feet hurt. No matter what I do my brain refuses to listen. I get to the edge of the building, stepping up on the ledge. I look down and my stomach drops because of how high up I am. Against my will, my legs turn my body around until I am facing away from the edge. Tears start falling from my eyes as I try to understand what is going on. My left foot takes a step backwards onto thin air. I can feel my weight shift and I start to fall; my right foot is about to slip.

"EDEN WAKE THE HELL UP!"

Alex shakes me awake.

"Dude! Are you ok?" Alex looks concerned. "You're crying."

I reach up to touch my cheek, sure enough it's wet.

"Huh." I say still half asleep and too shocked to care. What the fuck did I just dream about?

"I should call my mom."

"No. I'm fine, really. Please don't bother her at work."

Alex looks at me suspiciously, "Was it another one of those dreams about...um..."

"Yeah." I look out the window in their room.

"Ok. Do you need anything?"

I shake my head.

"Do you want breakfast?" they ask.

I didn't have an appetite after what just happened, but I nodded my head anyway. I needed some time alone.

"Ok, I'll make something really quick."

"Thank you," I say quietly.

Alex leaves me by myself in the quiet room. I look down at my arms. The scars are barely visible, but they are still there. I breathe in and out a few times to regain my composure as I run my hands through my hair a couple times. I get up from the bed and go out to the bathroom; splashing cool water on my face made me feel ten times better.

I mean, it was just a dream. My past won't bring me down, I won't allow it.

I exit the bathroom and enter Alex's bedroom again to start getting ready for the day.

♨_♨ Time skip ♨_♨

"Morning," Seishi walks into the kitchen while Alex finishes up with the breakfast. "Is this for me?" Seishi asks teasingly while taking a piece of bacon from the hot pan on the stove.

"It was for Eden, but I guess now it's not," Alex says sarcastically while rolling their eyes.

"I don't mind," I say. I didn't need a big portion of the food anyways.

Seishi looks at me and for a split second he has an expression of confusion on his face, but it disappears just as fast as it came. I tilt my head to the side wondering what that is about. Maybe I have something on my face? (Cardi B voice* That's weird...That's suspicious...)

Alex sets a plate down in front of me, distracting me from my thoughts. "This smells amazing."

"It tastes even better," Seishi smirks while ruffling his sibling's hair. Alex rolls their eyes at this.

While all of this is going on I check my old phone for any calls or messages from either of my parents. Nothing popped up. I guess they must be busy.

"Hey where are you going?" Alex asks in confusion. I turn my head to see Seishi walking towards the door.

"Out. I'll won't be home till late so don't worry about dinner or anything like that." Wow he has some toned back muscles... I should drink some water for how damn thirsty I am right now.

"Can we have more details?" Alex says with a sly smirk. "Is it a girl maybe?"

I silently choke on the water I was drinking. WTF Alex.

"Maybe. Maybe not. I don't have to tell you anything." Seishi gives a little smirk.

"No, you don't..." Alex looks down at the bacon on their plate and prods it with a fork, "But maybe your mind will change when I tell mom about that one night you brought home a girl and smoked two blun..."

"FINE, fine. I'm going to a guy friends house to hang out- "

"*cough* smoke weed *cough* *cough*"

Seishi gives Alex a death stare and they shut up quick. "No, the most we'll do is a shot or two."

There's a silence before Alex raises their eyebrow, "I know that's not all. C'mon tell us, we wanna know," Alex whines.

I give them a look like 'who said we?' and they roll their eyes.

"We are gonna go back to the club we went to the other night and have fun. I'm going now," Seishi did not sound amused.

"JOKES ON YOU I GOT ALL THE INFO I NEED!!" Alex calls out to Seishi who is already closing the door behind him. "Asshole," they say under their breath while pouting. I laugh at them. Classic Alex always wanting to annoy the hell out of people when they want something.

"So, what was all that about?" I cock my eyebrow while shoving a forkful of eggs into my mouth.

"Just making sure he's not hanging out with any other girls." They give a smirk while looking out the window near the door.

I get up to start placing dishes in the sink, "Wow you sound crazy right now. I mean if he wants to see other girls he can. I mean we aren't even in a relationship, he probably doesn't even like me like that anyways, and he is his own person."

"Oh Eden, so sweet and innocent." Alex has that trademark smile on their face, the one that always means trouble.

Wow I have not posted on here for a long time. It's been a crazy month so sorry about that. Anyways I hope you liked the chapter and if there are any mistakes lmk.

PS: The bold always means author is speaking/author note.

-Jayden