PILLOW

UPROOTED

sev-en-teen

you were supposed to be my best friend, honest to god, be there until the end's end. and when anything tried to break us apart, you know we'd be able to talk.

use our words to mend emotions, like adults do, because we're adults now, me and you, i thought you said you loved me because i said what was on my mind?

you let dick come between us, but somehow i get fucked, the one who had your back when everything was tough but i never realized on my own back, i never felt your touch.

you let dick come between us, but mine is on the floor, you rode me, my energy, and now you want some more, your boyfriends can't compare, they see me, they stare, but real recognize real and from my perspective, ain't shit clear.

sev-en-teen

years, of me and you, and as much as you hate it now, i'll still tell the truth, let's keep on digging and get to the root, your man signed up for me, and instead got you.

as much as you hate it, it's in my nature to say, he got with you but wanted me in your place, looking in your eyes but seeing my face but i never wanted his bitch ass anyway.

seventeen years, for me to forget, i taught you both so much and y'all ain't teach me shit, for seventeen years the benefit of the doubt, because "that's how you were," or "we could work it out."

i loved you both so fucking much, like you were sewn on my sides, but i was stuck, had to check the grass before i stepped, i'd carry you on my back except... except...

there's something better out there for me and it took stupidity to make me see that the one praising faithfulness and honesty was always me.

only me.

seventeen years, three plants in the pot, growing higher and stronger, i am the one.

for seventeen years, two plants beside me that was starving for water and sun.