The best one shots you ever did read

Mr crabs x Marge Simpson

"Oh baby girl, you're eyes shine brighter than clean coins" mr Crabs said, caressing my blue hair.

"Oh Homi- I mean.. mr crabs,"

He placed his hands on my lower back and brought me close to him. I was considerably taller than him, but it didn't matter.

"Eugene Crabs, you saucy man!" I could feel my cheeks getting warmer, and I knew he noticed by the smirk that was suddenly painted across his face, "kiss me." I blurted it out accidentally.

"But Marge, what about Homer." He loosened his grip on my body for a second.

"Oh screw 'em. He lost all his hair and his dicks small, unlike yours, handsome. You've got a fat cock, don't you." I winked at him, seductively.

I placed my arms around his shoulder and brought him close. He kissed me, and honestly, it was the best kiss I'd ever had, and I've kissed Flanders!

"Oh Marge, let's run away together."

"Let's do it." I kissed him passionately once more, and when we pulled away, gasping for breath, I had the idea, "oh fuck me till it hurts you sexy, sexy fish-man"

While he was taking off my clothes, I blurted out once more, "I love you, Crabs."

"You... love me?" He stepped away, leaving me shocked and half naked

"Oh Crabs, say it back!" Did I sound needy? Probably.

"No. The only thing I love, is me restaurant, me fry cook, and most of all, me money."

I rolled my eyes at him, "Mr Crabs, what about your daughter?"

"Don't care. Eats too much and gets on me nerve."

"You're a bad man. I regret sleeping with you that one time. Even though it was hot and steamy and the best I've ever had, you gave me aids. Shame on you, you filthy scum"

And with that, I stormed out of the room, but was quickly stopped by mr crabs reaching for my arm.

"OH OW!" I screamed, looking down at the cuts his claws left on me.

"My job here is done." He said, a half whisper.

He left the room singing astronaut in the ocean, leaving me to bleed out, half naked, lying on the floor.

"I meant it, crabs, I will always love you."

Darkness.