That Yale Thing: A Patrick Bateman x Luis Carruthers Story

The Restaurant

Luis was somewhat inebriated when Patrick came by his home. He had drunk half of a bottle of pinot noir and two bottles of Corona Extra. It wasn't difficult for Patrick to enter his house as the front door was slightly opened. Luis was coming to his senses on the car ride over to Dorsia but he was still intoxicated. Patrick helped him out of the car when they arrived. What a gentleman.

Patrick shuttled Luis through the doors of the restaurant. The exterior was a little dumpy, he thought, but it looked pretty busy. The parking lot was filled! It was awfully sweet of Patrick to get a reservation at Dorsia for him.

"Wow, this is Dorsia?"

Patrick was fiddling with a pen in his hand. He had stolen it from the hostess' booth. "Huh?... Oh, yes. This is Dorsia."

The hostess came to the booth. "Hi, welcome to—"

"Cut to the chase." Patrick cut the hostess' script, snapping the pen in his right hand.

"A booth for two, right?" The hostess didn't flinch at the suited man's snappy behavior. When Patrick stared blankly at her while Luis was staring at the lights above them, the hostess silently led the pair to their booth.

Luis had expected the place to be more elegant but he decided that the appeal must've been the food. Luckily, the menus were already there.

"Okay, so I'll be having the Moons Over My Hammy. I heard that it is an excellent experience. You'll be having the Santa Fe Sizzlin' Skillet. It has a nice Latin flair to it." Patrick paused briefly to glance at Luis, who was wide-eyed looking through the menu. "You're Latin, right?"

"No, Patrick." Patrick then cleared his throat and started looking around in the restaurant, hoping that Luis would forget about the question. Luis didn't like the silence and spoke again. "So, um, what would you like to drink?"

Patrick had forgotten about the drinks! He was going to cry for sure now. He hoped that Luis would have an idea.

"We can have a strawberry milkshake."

"That doesn't sound bad, Luis. Sure, I'll have one."

"No, silly. We are going to have a milkshake — together."

Patrick was starting to regret this date— dinner, this dinner with Luis. Jesus, did he think this was a date? Whatever, anything that gets Luis off of his back.

"That sounds great. Sure, a milkshake together." He would have to burn the inside of his mouth when he got back home.

The waitress came over to the table. She smelled like weed and rotten eggs. She pulled out a small stained notebook and a pen from her apron. "What would you two fellas like to eat?"

The pair turned their faces to the waitress. They already knew what to order. Luis was a bit giggly but Patrick paid no mind to that.

"One Moons Over My Hammy—", the men said together. As the men started their order, Luis was blushing heavily while Patrick's eyes started to shift slightly to Luis' direction, a bit upset.

"Gosh, I am so sorry. You can go ahead with the order." Luis batted his eyes, acting all coy. Patrick was going to vomit right then and there.

"... Right. As I was saying, one Moons Over My Hammy, one Santa Fe Sizzlin' Skillet, and one strawberry milkshake."

The waitress scribbled down the whole order, who was confused by the two Wall Street bankers ordering at a Denny's of all places. "Alright, we'll let you know when your order is ready!" She then scurried for the kitchen, shouting the order to the staff.

It was silent at the booth once again. Patrick was zoning out, fantasizing about Dorsia and killing Paul Allen again. Luis was zoning out, too, but he didn't mind staring at Patrick. At that moment, a song started playing in the background of the restaurant.