Jin Ling - This is my story!

Cloud Recess

After Wei uncle and Hanguang-Jun's wedding, we came back to Yunmeng. Each day I thought does Sizhui remember what happened between us. After our kiss he rested his head on my shoulder and I felt he is just living the moment. But, after some time I realised he actually fainted lying unconscious on my shoulder. I shook him but he was deep asleep. Placing him on his bed I was eagerly waiting to see his reaction when he is awake. However, as time passed I left kissing his forehead before uncle or anyone else finds out that we were drunk.

Three months passed. There was no new message from him. Each day I thought about him, our time together and his reaction. Next week there is new batch of training in Gusu. Uncle Jiang wanted me to attend to improve my cultivation skills. The Gusu training is one thing that even uncle Yao was impressed of and always praised Zewu-jun's teachings.

I too want to attend to learn, to be around Sizhui. But, at same time I am scared what if he feels I took his advantage.  But, wasnt it him who initiated? There are churns in my stomach thinking about it. I haven't seen him after our first kiss. I don't know how he will react. Will he remember or he was too drunk and our first kiss is only a memory for me to cherish. I wanted to be closer to him. But, I was also scared of loosing him. Should I skip the idea of going to Gusu? How can it be possible? Why am I so confused? I want to go as well as at same time I am afraid of loosing him.

I shall also be meeting Hanguang-Jun and Wei Wuxian after a long time. They had set out on journey after their wedding so that they could spend some time together.

On reaching gusu,

The gates were closed. Juggling with my thoughts I lost track of time. With disappointment I turned to go back home.

Wu Xin – "Jin Ling"

Wu Xin asked the guards to open the gates and took me inside Cloud Recess. As I was stomping he gestured me to walk without making noise.

Wu Xin - "Hey. How have you been?"

"I am good."

"You are not allowed to enter Cloud Recess so late. Come with me. I will show you the dormitory."

All the rooms of the dormitory were already full. I had no place to live until Wu Xin offered to share his dormitory with me. As I had no other option I shifted with him.

Next morning, I came for lecture with Wu Xin. My eyes were searching for Yuan and finally I saw him talking with Jingyi.

I and Wu Xin went inside the classroom but my eyes were still glued in the direction of Sizhui. Lan Qiren was standing in front with Zewu-jun and Hanguang-Jun.

Lan Sizhui came inside and took a seat in the front row. I wanted to sit next to him but I was still not sure of his reaction after the things that happened between us. I chose to sit across him from where I could avoid his gaze and still see him. After a while he turned back and seeing me he gave me a wide smile. Guilt penetrated within me and I just lowered my head pretending to be too much engrossed in books. The session began with each and every disciple introducing themselves and then Lan Qiren iterating 4000 Gusu rules to us.

After our class, I was the first one to leave. I met Wei Wuxian outside.

"So, class is finished or you are thrown out as punishment?"

"Why will I get punishment? I was just first to leave."

With a laugh he said "So you got so bored on your first day that you rushed out as soon as the lecture is over."

I could only smile at that. Obviously, I couldn't tell him I am running away from Lan Sizhui because I took his advantage when he was drunk and kissed him.

After a small talk I started walking again and I had no idea where I am going. Suddenly, someone from behind clasped my hand. I dint had to turn, I knew his touch, I knew its A Yuan. Turning around I realized I had walked too far. There was no one around.

"Hey, How have you been? ......Ah.....umm..... I am sorry for my impulse behavior that night. I promise I will never do that again or cross any of my limits".

So he knows it. He remembers.

"Why did you? I mean do you always do such things when you are drunk?"

"Ah! what do you mean Jing Ling? Do you see me holding hands with everyone? Its only you. I thought you were jealous because you also liked me or it was just I wanted to look at things like that. The way you cared for me, the way you looked at me, the way you yelled at me that night for being close to Jingyi. If you want to avoid me or stop talking to me, I will understand.  I just want to say I am working on my feelings for you and I shall never again let that hamper our friendship. I don't want to loose a friend whom I know will always be true and will never back-stab anyone".

I was stuttered. My heart fluttered. I was at loss of words. I was so ecstatic that I just wanted to stop him and shout out loud "I Love you Yuan". But, why am I not able to speak. Why on straining does it bleed? Damn it! Silence spell. What is wrong with this Lan sect people.

After speaking those words he lowered his head and turned around. I was so angry at him as I was not able to speak. At least he should have waited to listen my stance. I stomped my feet and seeing him go far away I pelted towards him and pulled him in a tug hug from behind. He tried to move but placing my chin on his shoulder I embraced him tightly. No matter what but now when I know he feels the same for me I can't let him go. Pointing the tip of Suihua on sand I wrote "Don't leave me Yuan. Didi ai ni".

He turned around and I was able to see his eyes were red and tears rolled down his cheeks. He waved his hand in front my mouth and finally I was able to speak.

"What is wrong with you A Yuan. You know how I felt these three months. I wasn't able to forget you even for a single day. Each passing day I missed you more. And now..." Talking his palm in my palm I kneel on ground "I wish to live my entire life with you".

He too kneel down in front of me. He caressed my lips with his forefinger. It was bruised and was bleeding.

Placing his lips on mine he started sucking the blood. He mumbled in between "I am sorry. I dint mean to hurt you." We kissed each other until we were at loss of breath. Instead of relieving the bruises on my lips the kiss turned it swollen. But, I was happy. Happy to have him with me, happy to kiss him when he is in his senses. Sitting under a tree, he laid his head on my chest. Then he removed a talisman from his pouch and drew few incantations on it with his blood and blew it in air. He took a paperman from his pouch and whispered something in its ears. Post that the paperman jumped from his hand on my lap and then went away.

"Yuan, what was this?"

"Nothing it's a spell which creates a transparent shield. Nobody can see us inside. If anyone is coming closer then the paperman will inform us".

"Who taught you this?"

"Wei Wuxian"

"Never do any of these tricks in front of Jiang uncle"

"Don't worry, I will be cautious while using it." He lifted his head and looked at me. There was spark in his eyes."Rulan, I have never used that bows and arrows. Can you teach me archery someday? I promise I won't teach not flaunt in front of Jingyi.

Hearing his plea I must have definitely blushed since I know I imagined hugging A Yuan from behind placing my left hand on his hand which was holding bow and with our right hands stretching the strings of the bow and releasing the arrow.