Ice Cold

Bucks POV

In his short life on earth, Buck had multiple near-death experiences. He'd seen the infamous white light, this time the white light appeared in the form of waves crashing into one another. The beach, often a happy place but since the tsunami all Buck felt was nervous, even afraid of the ocean and the ominous powers lurking beneath the surface.

He noticed another figure in the distance, their long brown hair blowing in the wind, hiding their face, wearing a loose white dress just shy of the sand on the beach. Buck thought it was ominous, the silence overpowering, but appreciative of the company. The figure started making their way over, their face still not revealed.

Until their head turned up and Buck found himself staring at Shannon, Eddie's ex wife, Christopher's mom, her death being a tragic one.

"Buck, what are you doing here?" For someone whose dead her reaction felt lifelike

"Uh, car accident after work, last thing I remember was feeling the shock from the cold"

"You can't leave him, please, please don't leave him the way I did"

Buck wondered briefly who the him was that Shannon was referring to, his heart feeling like it dropped at the realisation that by being here with Shannon, his body floating in between life and death, he left Christopher. A young boy who'd experienced far too much tragedy and loss for an 8 year old.

"Christopher"

Buck noticed the fond look Shannon gave him at the mention of Christopher's name, then a frown overtook her which confused Buck.

"Buck, I was referring to Eddie as well, he needs you, he l-"

"Eddie made his mind up the day in the supermarket, when he called me exhausting and then again when I got back with the 118. He doesn't care whether I live or die Shannon, he probably doesn't even know where I am. I don't even know where I am." Buck crumbled into the sand, not caring about the irritation from it.

"Eddie doesn't care about you? That is the biggest bullshit I've ever heard. That man looks at you like you're the sun, like you're his sun. In all our 8 years of marriage I never received a look on Eddie's face that could match that"

Shannon moved her hand, a small grey cloud hovering. Buck stared in wonder, briefly recognising the layout, the 118 walking alongside a body of water, their torches aimed at the ground.

Only to hear Eddie's voice

"Buck, BUCK, BUCK"

Buck felt the pain in his voice, his eyes tinging with tears.

Then another scene flashed, Eddie's hands were against his skin,

Thump, thump, thump

Against his heart

"Don't say it Hen, he's not dead until he's warm and dead" That explains why he's with Shannon in this interspace between life and death.

Then Buck saw himself get wheeled in to an OR with compressions carried out by multiple doctors. The scene flickered to Bobby, Hen and Chim looking at the door he'd been wheeled through with concern and slight tears in their eyes, then a blood-curdling scream erupted causing Buck to jump despite not physically being at the scene. Buck saw Eddie crumble to the floor, Bobby appearing at his side to hold him up. He looked heartbroken.

"I saw what he was like when I died, he was sad but in a way he was mentally prepared for my death. Buck, when he thought you'd died it looked like he'd lost a piece of himself, a piece that he could never get back. As if his sun had been snuffed out and he'd never get to experience the light from life."