Serendipity

You're awake

I groan, but it's muffled by the shower.

"Why did I kiss him?" I tear my hands through my soapy hair. My heart twists at the scent of Tim's shampoo, but I ignore it.

I wipe my lips with the back of my hand.

My mind flashes back to the kiss.

I blush and scrub my hair fiercely.

Why was I so impulsive? It's like I went on autopilot for a moment and some other person took over my body and gave me a shot of confidence. But then Tim just had to pull away like that.

I mean, I get it.

Before I was officially 'out', I brought over a boyfriend once, and he tried to kiss me. But I panicked and pushed him away because I was scared of my parents finding out.

But still, it hurts.

I groan again, pulling my hands free of my hair and seeing a chunk of hair stuck in my fingers. I wad it up and put it on the side so I can throw it away in the trash, not wanting to clog up his drain with all my hair.

"Hey, uh, Sydney?" I hear Tim's voice from outside the bathroom door and flinch.

"Yes?"

"I, uh, remembered just now that...you don't have any pajamas to wear."

"Oh."

True. Now that I think about it, I never packed anything for a sleepover since I wasn't planning for it.

"But, uh," He continues. "I have a hoodie and pair of shorts you could borrow. If you want."

My heart seizes up at the thought of wearing his hoodie. Which it shouldn't. Stop it.

"If you don't mind," I nod, forgetting he can't see me. "I would appreciate it."

Then the door opens, earning a yelp from me. I cover myself with my hands, even though there's a perfectly functioning curtain that shields me from his eyes.

"Sorry, sorry," He mumbles. "I'm just putting the stuff over on the counter."

I'm quiet until I hear the door close again.

"But, uh," He clears his throat. "I don't think my underwear will fit you. So. Yeah."

Feeling my face heat up at the image that conjures in my brain, I chew on the inside of my cheek and shake my head.

"Thank you," I touch the curtain gently, drawing a simple smiley face. "I'll be out in a minute."

"Oh, no need to rush," He assures me, and I think I hear him lean slightly closer. It's hard to tell over the sounds of the shower, but his voice gets a little clearer. "I usually go to bed pretty late anyway."

"What time is it? Am I taking too long?"

"It's about.... Nine thirty."

"Holy shit-" I gasp, then cough as water slips down my airway. I've been in the shower for an hour? How is there still hot water? I didn't think I was taking that long...

"Are you alright?" Tim's worried voice pierces my thoughts, bringing me back into focus.

I cough again, then feel a spike of panic when I realize it doesn't help.

It's just water, I try to tell myself. You'll be fine.

Except I feel myself suddenly getting less 'fine' when it gets harder to stand. The warmth of the shower continues to beat down on me, and my legs tingle as the rest of my body feels like the gravity of the sun is pulling it down.

"I feel..." I mumble, my mind filling with fog. "So...heavy..."

And then my vision fades and the last thing I feel is the sensation of falling.

---

A hushed, deeply worried voice slips through the darkness of my mind.

"Sydney?"

My entire body hurts, but especially my knees and forehead. My chin also throbs in painful pulses.

I try to move, but I can't. It's like there's a super heavy blanket covering me. Smothering me.

"Sydney?" The voice again. My thoughts start gathering back together. The voice must be...

"Tim?" I say. My mouth barely moves, but at least it shapes the word.

I hear a relieved sigh. "Sydney, you're awake."

I force my eyes to open and find myself in Tim's arms. Still wet. And naked.

I try to pull away- I'm still naked?- but he holds on to me.

"I covered you with a blanket," His arms are strong, but when I look back at his face, I see sweat gathered on his brow. He bows his head over me, letting out another shaky sigh. "Sydney-"

I open my mouth to speak, but close it again when I feel a drop of something fall onto my already-wet skin. Tears?

"I'm sorry-" He chokes up, squeezing me tighter. "All I heard was this thump-" He swallows thickly. "And I got really scared. I didn't know what to do."

"I should be the one apologizing," I say, laying my head back down when my vision spins again after keeping it held up for too long. "I just passed out because I took such a long shower."

"But I didn't know!" He lifts his head and stares at me, his eyes filled with tears. "And what if you hit your head really hard and died and the last thing I did was kiss you and then push you away-" He inhales. "Or if you lost your memory but still hated me because you hated me before-"

I slap his cheek about as hard as I can with my weak arms that only got weaker after passing out. He flinches and blinks.

"Shut up," I say. "I don't hate you."

He sniffs, blinking hard. "You don't?"

"No," I smile.

"But you looked like-"

"I got rejected," I interrupt him again. "What was I supposed to do? I came to terms with it right before I passed out-" a half lie. I came to terms with it about two seconds ago, but he doesn't need to know that. "So I wouldn't have hated you if I lost my memory."

"Oh," He glances up briefly and blinks his tears away before looking back down at me.

"And I don't think I hit my head hard enough for that anyways," I snort. "My knees and chin feel like they took the most damage."

"Are you okay?" He gasps, leaning down close so he can inspect my face. His eyes stay on my chin for a few seconds, but then they slide up to my lips.

I clear my throat and he jumps.

"Sorry," He mumbles. "It's just..." His face tints pink and he shakes his head. He slips out from under me and hands me the clothes he apparently was using as a pillow for my head before. "Here. I'll wait outside in case you need help."

"Oh, yeah, why don't you come help me put my clothes on-" I raise one eyebrow, intending to tease him, then notice his face flush more.

No.

He rejected me.

He can't be...

"I'm kidding," I clarify, looking down at the clothes in my lap instead of Tim.

He coughs and quickly ducks out of the bathroom. His footsteps don't continue.