Degraded

Chapter 18-Sam

"What do you want?" I ask, keeping a poker face on, not showing any emotion.

"I can explain-," he answers. Of course he says that, Beatrice comments, frustrated. She is right.

"You have," I start, looking at my imaginary watch, "twenty seconds. Any time over and I am leaving." I lend him one of my satisfied-with-my-rudeness evil, sarcastic smiles.

"Okay, your brother told me about that journal, but never told me what was in it. You can imagine my curiosity. So, I would ask him what was in it, but he would never tell me.

"When I found out he passed away," he says making me flinch, "I thought that this would be my chance to see what was in his journal."

"I thought you would be interested in finding it to see what was in it, so I asked you if you knew about it. You didn't, but you found it and I wanted so badly to see what was in it. I got obsessed and I'm sorry." He finishes.

"So, you think it is okay to just come and take the only thing my dead brother left for me? To use me, act like you like me and get me to actually like you? You know how selfish that is?" I question, my voice falling to a whisper.

"I'm sorry. You may not believe me, but I sincerely like you now. At the beginning I was so blinded by getting the journal I didn't realize the amazing person you were." He says.

Is he trying to flatter me? I can't figure out if he is telling the truth.

"Well, you get what you want now. You can read the stupid journal. Take it," I throw the journal to him, a fresh tear escaping my eye, "I want it back tomorrow, but don't be expecting anything from me. I have changed too, and I plan on never speaking to you again. Go."

I exit the room dramatically, and he leaves my house with his shoulders slumped and head down. He probably doesn't even want to read it now that I gave him what he wanted all along.

I need some time to process what just happened, and I am dreading getting the journal back from him tomorrow.

I feel like he was using me the entire time. He fed me the things I wanted to hear so he could have what he wanted, not me but a dumb journal.

I am so frustrated right now I could punch the wall. Not wanting to break anything though, I pluck a pillow from my bed and scream at the top of my lungs.

I flop down on my bed and naturally start speaking to my brother, praying for guidance and help.

What has happened with my life? I think.

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I am liking the way this book is coming out. I hope u guys like it! Thanks for reading!