Chrisker One-Shots

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"There's a stranger in my bed,
There's a pounding in my head
Glitter all over the room
Pink flamingos in the pool
I smell like a minibar
DJ's passed out in the yard
Barbie's on the barbeque
This a hickie or a bruise

Pictures of last night
Ended up online
I'm screwed
Oh well
It's a blacked out blur
But I'm pretty sure it ruled
Damn

Last Friday night
Yeah, we danced on tabletops
And we took too many shots
Think we kissed but I forgot

Last Friday night
Yeah, we maxed our credit cards
And got kicked out of the bar
So we hit the boulevard

Last Friday night
We went streaking in the park
Skinny dipping in the dark
Then had a ménage à trois
Last Friday night
Yeah I think we broke the law
Always say we're gonna stop
Op-oh-oh

This Friday night
Do it all again
This Friday night
Do it all again

Trying to connect the dots
Don't know what to tell my boss
Think the city towed my car
Chandeliers on the floor
Ripped my favorite party dress
Warrant's out for my arrest
Think I need a ginger ale
That was such an epic fail..."
Last Friday Night by Katy Perry

Warnings: Kind of crackish and slight MxM Smut

Chris groaned and opened his eyes. The light spilling through his window hurt his eyes and he automatically shut them again. There was something warm pressed up against his back and encircling his waist. His head pounded viciously as he tried to get his bearings straight. He remembered last night to an extent, but for the most part it was a blur.

Chris sat in the dim bar glaring at the back of a certain blonde's head. At this point the blonde should have spontaneously combusted where he sat a couple tables in front of Chris with a few of his friends. Why they had all been forced to come here when it was no secret that quite a few people in here wouldn't mind killing one another, he would never know.

He tore his gaze away from the monster before him and looked around the room. Claire, Leon, and Sherry were talking over by the bar with Jake standing behind the petite blonde like an overprotective boyfriend. The members of the STARS were joking around at a couple tables near the door. William and Annette Birkin were sitting with Wesker and Excella was hanging off the blonde trying in vain to catch his attention. Piers and Sheva were sitting at his table talking to each other, having already given up on talking to Chris. It was like one big dysfunctional family reunion. But where were Jill and Ada?

As that thought passed through his mind, the lights of the bar pretty much all went out and the stage lights at the front of the room came on. Chris blinked rapidly at the sudden change in light. Once he stopped blinking, his eyes widened fractionally and his mouth hung open slightly. On the stage was Ada and Jill with microphones in their hands.

"Alright boys this for you," Ada purred.

"Because some of you really just need to take a hint," Jill finished.

Without further ado, music began to fill the room.

"La la la," the two women sang together for a moment.

"Why am I always hit on by the boys I never like?" Ada sang, staring pointedly at Simmons. "I can always see 'em coming, from the left or from the right."

"I don't want to be a priss, I'm just try'na be polite," Jill sang, her gaze sweeping across the people before landing on Wesker. "But it always seems to bite me in the..."