Deja Vu สังหรณ์รัก { English Translation }

PROPHECY 10 "BLURRY OR HAZY"

My life had been pretty good as of late. After the accident, it was like my head was hit by a big blow. All the bad stuff seemed to have disappeared, the best thing was that I never dreamed of it again. Suddenly the nightmare disappeared just like it did when I was 8 years old, and the loss of that dream made me happier.
                    
Besides, the job I got could also be called a comfortable job with good income. Because I worked as a cashier, whose job was only taking orders and payments, and my co-workers were also very kind. And most importantly, every morning on my dining table, there were always sticky rice and roasted pork.
                    
And I must’ve gone crazy, every morning I always smiled at the sticky rice and roast pork. I didn't know where the stupid thought came from, but I believed that the rice and pork were from P'Kin, and he did that because he loved me. Otherwise, why would he bother to buy me food? However, I didn't want to think too much, maybe that was a form of concern for me as a senior or a brother, as he said since taking care of me when the accident happened.
                    
A few days ago, I was back on my bike to go to university. Although P'Phu still didn't agree, I still insisted on doing this. I didn't want my black knight to be lonely. I promised to always spend time with him, before my savings were sufficient and I could buy a nice, yet not so expensive bike, then return the black knight to P'Kin. I actually wanted to return it to P'Kin first, but I was sure P'Kin wouldn't accept it. P'Kin lent me the bike because I didn't have one, so I had to buy a new one before returning it. As he told me, the things that weren't ours, wouldn’t be ours forever no matter what.
                    
Then there was the problem with Ai'Tong. A few days ago I stayed at his condo, yet he didn't say anything about what happened after the event in the cafeteria with Ai'Rei. It was very strange how Ai'Tong hated that person so much. We had been friends for a long time, but I still didn't understand his way of thinking. Even when he first dated his senior, he was scared to tell me because his lover was a guy. At that time he was also young, so he was a little scared and confused, even afraid that I would feel disgusted with him. Since he felt ashamed, he tried to cover up their relationship, but in the end he dared to admit his relationship with the senior named P'Chu to me. I was angry at first but then I felt that the two of them seemed compatible, so I tried to accept it. However, I didn't know they ended up breaking up after dating for only a few months.
                    
Actually Ai'Tong was shorter than me. However, even if he was short, his appearance looked cuter than mine. Thinking about that, I closed my eyes, feeling like I wanted to protest to P'Kin. Why did he call me Shorty or Little Puppy when there was someone shorter than me, namely Ai'Tong. And regarding the matter of Ai'Tong, I still believed that both of them had the same feelings. I wanted to tell Ai'Tong about my thoughts, but if I told him and asked, it would definitely be a waste of time.

***

Today is Saturday, I have a schedule for dance practice at university. Even though I didn't like such things, for the sake of getting a big reward, I had to do my best.
                    
One day my little sister cried because my father was going to transfer her to a public school. She was in third grade, and my younger brother was in sixth grade at the international school where Ai'Tong and I used to attend. The tuition every semester at that school was more expensive than mine. But I understood what my parents did, because changing schools when entering fourth grade would seem normal. Even now they were still clenching their teeth so that both of them could graduate from the old school before changing schools.

My little sister was the youngest daughter. Everyone pampered her like a child, I also loved her very much. So, I was going to try to save a lot of money and send it to my parents to pay for my little sister's old school.

And there was no sticky rice and pork on the table that morning….

There were just a really tasty sandwich, a croissant and freshly squeezed orange juice. But… I became suspicious, that kind of food was more like the food that P'Phu usually gave than P'Kin. People like the boring P'Kin, if someone told him what they liked, he would give them the same thing/food to death, no intention to change the menus.