Girl in Blue

11 - Civil War

A memory:

Atlas sat inside the coffee shop with impatience. She was on edge. Her leg shook with anxiety and her hands fumbled with themselves as she stared at the coffee in front of her. She knew why Peter wanted to see her in person. She had been avoiding him. It had been months since she picked up his last phone call, and even longer since she last saw him.

She flinched when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She looked back to see Peter. "Hey," he said with a small smile.

"Hi," Atlas said, forcing a smile. She was more nervous than she was happy to see him. He took a seat in front of her, looking at the coffee she had bought for him. He grabbed it and took a sip.

"Thanks," he said, acknowledging the coffee. "How are you? How've you been?"

"Uh, I've been okay. I was cleared to go the school last month, and Tony says I'm cleared for the field now," Atlas said, updating Peter on the major injuries she had sustained in Laos.

"What about your hand?" he asked, knowing that her arm had sustained the most damage on the mission.

"Pretty good actually. The physio says I have full mobility back, it's just a matter of strength now," Atlas said, subconsciously closing and opening her fingers into a fist.

"And what about Bucky?" Peter asked. Atlas unknowingly laid a hand on her lower stomach.

"...He's gone. And I know he doesn't wanna be found right now, so..." A saddened expression took over her face, but only for a moment. "What about you? How's May?" 

"She's good, she's good. Yeah. She still doesn't know about the whole... y'know," Peter said hesitantly. "Look, I, uh, wanted to talk about something..."

Atlas got nervous. Nothing good usually came out of people going out of their way to talk to her. "Yeah?"

"What really happened in Laos?"

"What do you mean what really happened? You read my report."

"No I know, but I mean with you. You've been different."

Something in Atlas clicked, she couldn't explain her frustration. "Well I was stuck in a hospital bed for two months, and right after I told Bucky I loved him, he walked out of my life. I think it should be more surprising if I wasn't different," she said defensively.

"Hey I didn't mean it like that I just meant there's something else, and I don't understand why you're keeping it from me."

"'Cause it's no one's business, including yours," Atlas said angrily. She always got defensive about her and Bucky's baby, no matter who it was. She thanked her doctors for keeping her pregnancy between her and them, but she hated carrying the burden of that secret. She knew no one could know, because they would ask if she was okay and why she didn't keep it, and she knew she wouldn't be able to answer either of those questions with a positive response.

"Atlas c'mon."

Peter had no idea how badly Atlas wanted to tell him. But she thought it was wrong that anyone found out before Bucky did, and he wasn't there. "Seriously, Peter. Stop prying," she said.

"But-"

"No. Stop," Atlas said, quickly grabbing her backpack and standing up from her chair. "It's not something you want to hear, and It's not something I'm going to tell you, no matter how much you try. If that's all you wanted to come here for, then you shouldn't have come at all"