Witch Doctors Inc: SEASON ONE (Completed!)

Part 4.20

PRESENT TIME
LILY

Onyx isn't happy, but I'm doing this. There are plenty of heart pieces I can do without. Who needs fear, for instance? Who needs grief?

It's my fault Amanda is trapped in her own body. It's my fault her daughter might be left motherless.

I'm not really sure how to give up a piece of my heart. Onyx sure wouldn't tell me. Addy sits by my side though, her hand in mine, and we watch Amanda's chest rise and fall. The curse antidotes hadn't worked. Of course they hadn't worked.

"I think you can feel where your heart is," Addy tells me quietly. "You know how to sense energy. You felt it when Hami's heart was gone."

It was true. I am energy, and I can see the energy around me if I want. Life energy, emotional energy, spiritual energy. It has a look, and it has a feel. I can see the black lattice sinking into Amanda's body. The Dark Witch's curse. There's a thread that runs from it to the wall, and then, I assume, all the way back to the dolls at Tyfyr House.

I feel for my heart. It leaps in my chest, a wondrous thing, a terrible thing. I feel...everything. My love for Onyx, beneath all the annoyance. My fear about turning out just like the Dark Witch. My memories, all in a tangle. A cauldron bubbling with the wrong spell. A city of mirrors. A black cat preening itself in my nursery.

And...guilt. The guilt I'd pushed down. Bronna's eyes, lifeless. Her sister, alone. The guilt had been too much, so I'd pushed it down. Then I was guilty about the lack of guilt, so I pushed that down too. But here it was, all that guilt , and I couldn't handle it. I know which piece of my heart I want to give away.

I reach for the guilt. It feels ugly against the rest of my energy. I pull it out. There is so much of it. It isn't just Bronna's death. I almost killed Addy's mother. I would've done it too, if Rikamu hadn't given her heart back to her. I hurt Addy when I wasn't in control of my powers. I didn't destroy the orb of Ariadne, and what if it came back?

I pull all of it out. It coalesces into a shining ruby shard. I launch the shard at the curse lattice. It pierces the thread. A crack appears, ruby-red and throbbing. I put more guilt into the shard. The crack spreads. Red begins to seep into the lattice. I put some more guilt in.

Maybe I'm putting in too much. I don't know. But I don't want it, and it feels good to have it gone.

Where the red touches, the black disappears. It moves along the thread too, the one that leads back to Tyfyr House.

I stop the flow from my heart into the shard. It's powerful enough now. The curse is being neutralised, just like Onyx said.

And my guilt is gone.

I remember what happened to Bronna now. The memory comes to me easily. She died. I killed her. But it wasn't my fault.

I am lighter.

I am free.

This is the way I want to be.

From somewhere deep in my mind, the Dark Witch laughs.