Never Let Them Define You

LIGHTING A FIRE UNDERFOOT

After an hour of rehearsing a fast-paced dance, she feels exhausted but exhilarated at the same time, and she's not losing her stride.

"Getting tired yet?" asks her choreographer James.

"Ha! I feel like a million bucks." She steps back, to the left, spins around, and bends over backward as he catches her and pushes her back to standing. "I'm truly inspired, it's been so long!"

"You think you got it pretty good so far?"

"Yes," she scoffs, "I think so." Three steps forward, arches forth and jumps high with her right leg forward and left leg back, then lands gracefully and spins with her hands held together in the air. Adrenaline courses through her as she steps and bends, her arches feeling every divot in the wooden floor, her eyes focusing only on the space around her as she navigates through it; the fire in her heart cannot be contained. She feels the whole room catch fire from the friction in her shoes but stays dancing in the heat, her eyes dry out and tears fall on the floor but this can't stop her, and the emotions of her work only draw more passion from deep inside her.

Again, she steps back, to the left, spins around, and bends over backward but holds herself in the air right before she tips over and then exhales sharply. She pulls herself forward, shaking and sweating, and wipes the tears from her eyes. "Oh my God!" She gasps for air and begins hyperventilating. "Water!" she rasps.

"On it!" He runs towards a huge water cooler and keeps looking back at her.

I thought this was a scam. "Jesus Christ! That almost made me believe in God." She hacks and bends forward, holding her knees, and heaving as she stands over the ground.

"Here you go." He gives her a massive plastic cup full of water. "Are you okay?"

She chugs the drink, holds a finger up to him until she finishes it, then hands it to him, and swings her arms high in the sky. "I'm amazing!"

He looks at her sideways. "Are you sure?"

She rolls her eyes. "I think so." She plops on the floor and sits with her legs crossed. "What'd you think?"

"Um, it was...perfect."

"Oh, thank God!" She bends over and grasps the floor before her. "I need a break, though." She sits up, rolls over, and lays on her back; she looks up at the ceiling, which has a captivating red and blue art deco pattern. It consists of fans placed on top of and beside each other with a thin purple margin around the whole roof."Wow, I never really looked up before."

"Yeah, it's not bad; how are you feeling?"

"Still tired, don't rush me."

"Okay, sorry." He walks away from her and grabs a cup of water.

She closes her eyes, smiles, and spreads her arms and legs like an angel. I think something's happening to me...I feel some great force. A higher power, maybe, or just a superstition of something greater. I think I need to-

"Hi, Cassandra! What are you doing down there?" asks Josephine.

Her eyes shoot open, she rolls to the side, and sits up with her arms behind her for support. "Jesus, Josephine, I was taking a break because I'm working hard."

"Well, that's wonderful news!" She throws up her arms. "You know what else is wonderful?" A manic smile takes hold of her face and she keeps her arms raised.

"Um, what?"

"I got promoted! Haha, now I'll be working above you." She smiles even wider, a little too wide, and laughs heartily. "Oh, this is gonna be great."

"Above me?" She shakes her head and does a double take. "Doing what?"

"Well, I've been taking classes for a while at the local university and I've been training here to be a producer. Oh, it's gonna be great."

"Why do you keep saying great like that? It will be fine, average, just dandy."

"Oh, of course." Her smile turns into more of a grin. "Well, I'll let you get back to what you were doing; you were just the first person I wanted to tell."

She steps back and waves slowly as she watches her walk away. What the fuck? She looks sideways and scratches her head, then looks at James. "What do you make of that?"

"Oh, I don't know, she's crazy, I just stay away from her."

That drawing...