INDECISIVE ✔️

CHAPTER 10

"I must admit, Nate is a good guy" Stella beam, her eyes sparkling with adorations. Am really grateful I had Nate in my life. Who knows what could have happened to me if he hadn't fight the rapist off. I couldn't help but feel sad. He's hurt because of me, he's passing through pains because of me. I stood up and rush into the bathroom.

Quickly doing my thing; showering ,brushing my teeth, I wrap a towel around my waist and move to enter the room when I heard Joy's speaking. "Something doesn't add up" Her voice was laced with worries. "How do you mean?" Stella voice came out as a whisper. I guess it's was something they didn't want me to hear– or at least Stella doesn't. "I called Jude and he said –"

"... Wait. What?! You called Jude? As in your cousin after Esther specifically warned you not to?" Stella rasp and I felt in fist clenched. I didn't want anyone knowing about what happened. I thought it could be our little secret. They're my friends, I trusted them and they betrayed me. Joy betrayed me. "Would you just listen?!" Joy whispered yelled making Stella remain queit.

How could they even gossip behind my back? I was just few feet away and they couldn't even wait till I left? I couldn't explain how I felt right now and there. I thought they were my friends. "Jude saw Esther left with Nate. He said she was passed on on his arms and–"

"And what, joy? And what?!"  I storm into the living room furiously. How dare she? I told her repeatedly not to mention anything to her cousin and she did. She betrayed my trust. And I  knew everything has to do with Nate. Her crazy hatred towards him. "Nate could have been the rapist. C'mon, isn't anything clicking?" She roll her eyes, crossing her arm together before me. "He lied to you Esther! I get it if you don't trust me or stop talking me" She sigh, her eye soften "But you need to know Nate isn't who you think he is. That guy is a psychopath. A fucking crazy–"

"STOP!!!" I yelled. Steph flinched but Esther remain unfazed. I have had enough of her shit! "I can't see anything right now than how insane you are. You're the psychopath! I can't understand you're hatred and bitterness toward him. That guy has never said anything bad about you. I specifically emphasizes on 'Do not tell your cousin and it should be a secret!" A fucking secret! But no! You just went gossiping behind my back" I yelled out in frustration, tears streaming down my face. Everything was a bad idea. I shouldn't have gone to the fucking party! I shouldn't have trusted them. But I know better now, I have no friends nor confidant. "Esther hear her out. Let's just calm down and talk about this"Stella plead, her voice breaking. Of course the puppet has something to say?

What was there to hear out?

"I don't want to be a part of this friendship. We can never understand each other. You can never accept the guy I love without any benefit of doubts but guess what, you guys opinion doesn't count. You can just go fuck yourself!" I yelled, picking up my clothes and wearing them in a rush. I didn't glare their way, I just keep packing my stuff. I was about walking out from about six years of friendship– it's hurts but I guess it's for the best. They aren't my friends,atleast not anymore. such hypocrisy. "Esther please.. just calm down" Stella begged, moving toward me, trying to stop me.

"Leave her be. Let her do whatever she think is right. But always remember my words Esther. Remember I told you so"  Just like that, Esther left the room. With one last glare from Stella, she left with Joy. Yeah! With Joy! She didn't even try talking to me. She didn't take my side. I guess they weren't truly my friends, they just pretended to be one. I didn't wait any longer, I picked up my things and head to the hospital to see Nate. Fuck their opinion.Fuck their friendship and fuck joy! Miss Omni knowest.
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I board a bus to the hospital since I don't have a car of my own yet. Quickly getting off the bus, I head toward the door. After describing and explaining my relationship with Nate to the Nurse that attended to me, I was finally told the room he was at. Entering into a small grey iron door, Nate was there, laying on the bed looking so pale and sick. His pretty face was covered in bandages. His lip busted and eyes swollen–Oh my god!.

I rush toward him and couldn't help myself as I burst into tears. He was wounded so badly all because of me. He's hospitalized because of me!. My head bent on his side of the hospital bed, I never cried this much, but I cried my eyes out. When it's comes to this guy, you can always call me dumb, vulnerable for loving this badly but, my feelings would remain the same. Opinions doesn't count when it's comes to Nate; whatever anyone says about him either bad or good, I only believe and trust one person – I only trust what Nate says.

A firm rough hand soothe my back, caressing it softly. I raised my head, only for Nate hand to stroke my back. Looking at his face right now was the hardest thing for me. He was beaten black and blue all because of me and I was just selfish– Selfish to be mad at a boy who risked his life for mine. "Am so sorry Nate. If I haven't gone to that party, everything would have been okay" Even if It could have happened soon, if I haven't gone to the party, maybe I won't have fought with my best friend. They won't have been anything to quarrel about. Maybe Nate won't have gotten badly hurt because of me. It's always my fault every fucking time. "Don't say that baby. Nothing is your fault, it's mine. I should have been more careful" his hand cupped my face, brushing off my tears with his thumbs. "Don't ever blame yourself for any of this. I'd die for you if that's what it's takes to save you. I deeply care about you Esther, more than anyone ever could" Nate pull me into a not so tight hug after he brushes his lips to my ear and whisper;

"Always remember that."